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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/newsletters/action/archives/id/9908
Comedy: December 11, 2019 Issue [#9908]




 This week: Unwritten
  Edited by: Robert Waltz Author IconMail Icon
                             More Newsletters By This Editor  Open in new Window.

Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter

There is a misleading, unwritten rule that states if a quote giving advice comes from someone famous, very old, or Greek, then it must be good advice.
         -Bo Bennett

There's that unwritten schism that literary writers get all the awards and commericals writers get all the success.
         -Jodi Picoult

No written law has ever been more binding than unwritten custom supported by popular opinion.
         -Carrie Chapman Catt


Word from our sponsor

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Letter from the editor

Every once in a while, I'll see an article or blog post about "the unwritten rules of x," where "x" is something modern and annoying like email, texting, twitting, or dating.

And few of them make sense.

For example. I've read the following two rules about texting:

1) Always include an emoji with every text.

2) Never return a text from a crush right away.

Confession time: I just now made up one of those. I'll let you decide which one.

But that leads me to the real problem with unwritten rules, which is: by the time I see them, they're no longer unwritten, and I've already broken the hell out of them.

For instance, apparently, "Liking" something on social media  Open in new Window. doesn't mean you like it, but that you're interested in the person posting it.

And they ask me why I avoid social media.

Actually, no, they don't, because they can't find me because I'm not on social media. Which I'm sure violates an unwritten rule, so I'll make the opposite of that a written rule:

Avoid social media.

That make sense? More sense than some of the texts I've gotten, probably, what with all the emojis and misspellings.

So I've got my own set of unwritten rules, and here's some of them:

1) Don't play games. Except D&D. I like D&D. Maybe Scrabble. Definitely not Monopoly.
2) Everything is not fraught with meaning that you have to tease out over endless hours of conversation with other people.
3) If you include an emoji with every text, I will block you.
4) No, you're not going to read my mind.
5) I already know I'm funny, thanks. But looks aren't everything.

Oops! Now they're written rules, too.

So, what are some of the unwritten rules of social interaction you know that I don't? I'm sure there are thousands.


Editor's Picks

Just some funnies for you:

 Hikikomori Open in new Window. [18+]
DO NOT OPEN UNTIL CHRISTMAS- yeah, right.
by PuppyTales Author Icon


 TWENTY-FISH Open in new Window. [13+]
Laughter reigns when a cocky city boy mis-hears a little girl.
by SandraLynn Author Icon


Imagination Alphabet Open in new Window. [E]
Add the next funny or interesting word. Use your creative imagination!
by Maryann Author Icon


 The Day the Farm Stood Still Open in new Window. [E]
Take me to your leader tale at a farm
by Hyperiongate Author Icon


 
Howl Open in new Window. [13+]
The new neighbors have a strange ritual.
by Don Two Author Icon


 
Ready, Set , Blastoff Open in new Window. [E]
The vision that lead to the space program
by drifter Author Icon


Casey and his 'maiden' Open in new Window. [13+]
Does love need a psychic?
by Osirantinous Author Icon


 How the Penguins Saved Christmas Open in new Window. [E]
The night before Christmas...
by ⭐Princette♥PengthuluWrites Author Icon

 
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Word from Writing.Com

Have an opinion on what you've read here today? Then send the Editor feedback! Find an item that you think would be perfect for showcasing here? Submit it for consideration in the newsletter!
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Ask & Answer

Last time, in "Talking TurkeyOpen in new Window., I went on a rant about Thanksgiving food.


Quick-Quill Author Icon: Funny you should mention crickets I have a tube of orange flavored ones in my desk drawer. When I started Keto I was informed they are high in protein. They are still in my desk, unopened. I haven't got that hungry though I have coworkers that down them and ask for more if we are near the store that sells them...Nope not there yet.

         I... I got as far as "a tube of orange flavored [crickets]," and my mind's gears ground into dust.


BIG BAD WOLF is Howling Author Icon: Me, I eat turkey, ham, potatoes, sweet potatoes, pie, cookies, more turkey and ham, and finally, ask whats for dessert.

         Dessert? More turkey! Also for the next three weeks.


Beholden Author Icon: Thank you so much for including my story, Bogwart's Best Birthday, among the Editor's Picks.

         Thank you for writing!


So that's it for me for December, and for 2019 - best wishes for a happy (and hilarious) holiday season and a laughter-inducing New Year! Until next time,

LAUGH ON!!!

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