Death's Prank

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One cold night, I was docking my boat,
When all at once I had a fright, fore
I heard the walking of stranger upon the float.
Looking over I couldn’t see well, for there was no light, but it looked sort of pale.
He wore a black veil,
With a cowl overlaying his pate.
In his hand he held a scythe.
The stranger walked over and said in a raspy sort of voice
“Sorry to tell thee, but you’re late.
It’s all sealed within thy fate”

“How can that be I’m only fifty-eight?” I asked.
“Thee hast frozen to demise” came my horrible answer.
“Dost not feel bad until thee hast seen the Land of the Dead and what there lies
You’re lucky thee didn’t feel thy death
If thee had lived two more years thee would hast died of cancer.
Now follow me”

So to the Land of the Dead, Death led
I followed nigh behind.
Wondering what lie in the Land of the Dead,
And what there would I find.
For hours and hours I pursued Death,
And I learned that he was really sort of kind.

I looked around and saw that
We were walking through a hall with massive stone pillars.
Flying by us overhead was the biggest and darkest bat I had ever seen.
Death said that those bats were vicious killers.

I wasn't tired at all so I wondered if I was a ghost.
Looking around to verify it was clear, the coast
I tried to lean against the wall,
But instead I went right through it,
And found myself in a darkened forest.

In the distance I heard the call of the raven
That had seemed so familiar in my life at the pub by the dock.
Then all at once I heard a key being put into a keyhole and being locked
I felt as though my fate had been sealed and I in it.
I could feel as though life was being sucked out of me,
My vision soon faded and all I could see was darkness.
I could no longer breathe and I felt as though I was dying.
Yet how could that be since I had already died?
Then I heard a knock and the key unlocked.
A decaying hand came out of nowhere and pulled me toward its owner,
And I found myself back in the hall with pillars.

Next I found myself standing with Death,
So I asked, “What happened in the forest?”
“Thee entered the land between the Land of Life and the one of Death.
All dead that enter there feel nothing but pain.
Now we must officially seal thy fate,
In order for thee to enter the Land of the Dead.”
Dead said in vain.

Death walked up to an enormous leaden gothic style gate.
He gave me a golden key and told me to seal my fate
Studying the key I saw that upon it was writing
But due to the lighting, it was kind of hard to see.
The writing was in fact cursive handwritten and hard to read anyway.
For some reason unknown I knew that the writing upon the key was a name.

I put the key into the keyhole and turned.
The key slowly turned a grayish color.
And the gate opened,
Behind the gate was a sepulture,
With hundreds upon hundreds of graves as far as the eye could see
Death said, “This is where thee shall be”

We treaded very cautiously
Before each stone there was a door
And Death led me through the grave’s core to one particular stone.
Engraved upon it in the handwriting of my own
Was my very title and death date.
Then it all came back to me that I was late.

Next thing I knew the surrounding graves faded into a blur,
And my name and date soon faded as well.
I heard the engine of a car, from off a far.
A hearse and its chauffeur then came into view
I heard the slamming of a trunk and the silent ringing of a church bell.

I saw six pallbearers holding a shiny wooden coffin,
However, it looked darker then any night
I had seen while alive.
Seated down upon some chairs my closely related persons, in all there were five.
My wife, son, daughter, co-worker Fred, and my boss John.
I worked and slaved in the Fishing Industry as his helpful and loyal pawn.

The preacher read from the Bible and my wife got up and spoke.
“My husband was one of the better common folk.”
And after her speech my children got up and said what I meant to them.
The door before my stone swung open revealing a six foot deep hole.
The pallbearers lowered the coffin and I felt my life being drained from me by a leach.
I felt I was a broken limb,
Hanging from the majestic tree.
In life all the pain I caused,
I knew this was my fee.

Then and there I learned that I was in the bad area of the Land of the Dead.
I looked at Death and said “This has got to be a red herring or a joke
I’m surly not one of those blasted evil folk.”
The cold truth of death we dread.
“Enjoy your stay.” Death said.
Then he faded from my side,
And I really hoped that he had lied.

All at once my flame went out.
I felt the fall from the life bearing tree,
Into that hole I fell.
Oh why did I lock my fate with that little golden key?
And landed into my darkened prison cell.
The door to my grave shut.
At the last second I realized that the name on the key
Was meant for someone other than me
With a cruel fate ahead.
Except I was dead,
And had sealed my fate with their key.
Poof! Crack! Slam!
Darkness.
Nothing…
Oh death what tragedy.