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I am hungry. Three nights without any food and my brain screams to be satisfied. The pits of my stomach is empty, my mind is filled with an over abundance of thoughts. Searching for a way to satisfy and to soothe the screaming deep inside of me.
Hence the reason why I am out tonight roaming the empty streets in the lonely night. The temperature had dropped a few more degrees since I’ve left my safe haven hours before, but the colder weather does not bother me. Just the opposite I relish the cool air against my skin. I had on a light coat in my favorite stereotypical color of black along with black slacks and shoes, giving the look of someone who had just gotten off work but that was just to blend in with my surroundings. I inhale the cold air yet I need not to nevertheless I do it to remind me. With my hands in my pockets I continued to walk. Nothing is open this late at night except for the occasional twenty-four hour delis, even they did not look inviting, with it’s metal jail like bars both on the windows and on the doors. Up and down the streets of Manhattan, still searching with the screams getting louder with each block.
Tompkins Square Park comes into view pondering to myself whether or not I should stroll through. There is nothing more sinister than a large open spaced park with no lights other than the half working street lamps that litter the area, giving the park even more a sinister glow. Moonlight is the only other source of light to guide anyone who wants to take this path as a short cut.
What the heck I think to myself it’s not like I have anything to lose. Smiling to myself and even humming an old tune my mama used to sing to me when I was a child, which was ages ago, I proceeded in crossing the street and entering the park. A normal walk through the park normally took all of ten minutes but despite my empty belly I walked at a leisurely pace taking in the snow that still covered the grounds, some of it decorating the trees.
Despite the snow there were still dry leaves in mixed shades or reds, oranges, browns and even some with hints of greens on the ground, the crunching had my ears perked in anticipation but that was quickly lost, nothing but a few stray black squirrels coming out of their hiding in search of the hidden nuts they had buried probably back in the spring and summer. Half way through the park slightly disappointed that there wasn’t anything happening. “When did New York become this dull?” I murmured to myself shaking my head before going back to humming.
My reflection on the car window causes me to smile showing long canine sharp teeth on either sides of my mouth, which I preceded in running my tongue over.
A group of young looking females were heading in my direction laughing going home from probably hanging out. All the girls were dressed more or less alike, something from one of those GAP commercials that I constantly tuned out but still were plagued with the ads filling Manhattan like one giant billboard. I can smell the ripe scents of perfumes mingling together that assaulted my sensitive nose. They walked by me the shortest girl with her unruly mess of curls catches my eyes and smiles. I keep my head down staring at my feet and continue walking. The assault of their perfumes and lack of fear strolling through the park renders my own ability to clearly conjure up a plan. Together they were too strong to avoid, alone would be easy but this wasn’t the case. Without out food my mind is somewhat dulled having a bit of a harder time to react.
I frown now that I’ve missed my chance the only evidence of the girls were the sounds of their laughter trailing with the scents of their perfumes lingering in the cold crisp air. I had to get out of this park. My pace becomes quicker and I take longer strides I am out of the park and back into the brightly lit street in a matter of seconds. Some of the bars are still open but they don’t tickle my fancy tonight. Searching so hard to find something it would be spoiled if there weren’t even a hint of a challenge. I relish the idea of a game that I be the hero or maybe the villain… A few more blocks I come across another deli much like the ones from earlier except the metal bars were gone. Not worried about thieves and vandals this storeowner either had the balls or was too stupid to understand the dangers of the city.
I guess this was as good of any store that maybe can ease the hunger pains. Opening the door a small jangle signaled my arrival, walking briskly and efficiently through the aisles filled with over processed highly sugared confections that surely would send me into a sugar coma if I choose these items. Against the wall were more sugar filled confections only this time they took on the shapes of cans and plastic bottles with names of evil companies such as Coke and Pepsi.
Browsing for a few minutes the teenaged boy behind the counter barely glanced up from the magazine he was reading. I picked up a package of Hostess but dropped it again. The jangle of the door had my attention stray to the door where a woman in her mid twenties entered. She strolled in with a purpose not once glancing my way she made her way over to the sodas pulled one out, grabbed also a pint of Ben and Jerry and proceeded to the counter. I watched this all with fascination as the boy rang up her items and she paid, thanking him she left. Without thinking I grabbed the pack of Winterfresh gum off the counter and tossed a crumpled dollar onto the counter.
“Keep the change.” I said already ready heading for the door.
Once outside I didn’t see where this woman had gone but I had picked up her scent in the store. Turning the corner I walked up the street the sweet smelling scent of her became stronger she was standing at the crosswalk waiting for the light to switch to walk. I slowed down and waited for her to cross the street before I followed her again. She didn’t seem to notice anyone following her. She was in a world of her own. I caught a few scattered thoughts here and there. The worries she had of her cat that had been sick for the past week along with the nagging of her mother about getting a new job and worries about people finding out about her new job.
A few more twists and turns till she reaches a short reddish building. She digs for her keys in her purse but accidentally drops her pepper spray. Cursing she bends over to pick up the small container I still was across the street but I still got to enjoy the view. Dropping the offending item back into her purse she finally locates the keys and opens the door without any more trouble.
Before the door could swing shut I eased myself through the door right before it shut. I follow her scent up the stairs and sees her entering her apartment. Getting ready to strike and claim what was mine in this game that she didn’t know she had joined. Suddenly a fairly large fat calico cat slithers out of the apartment and through her legs. She reaches down to pet the cat and to shoo it back into the apartment when she the cat’s meow alerts her. She is now looking at my direction and I cannot hide. I smile at her and she looks a bit startled but she doesn’t smile back. Picking up on the sense that something wasn’t all right she quickly walks into the apartment with the cat. Just as the door closed and the chains slide into place for the night I catch another voice.
“Honey, did you get the ice cream?” A female voice and once again my plans are lost.
As I walk down the stairs the events of the evening coming back to me I shake my head in shame I am losing my touch. Out of the building and back into the night I go with one thought that fills my mind. I am hungry.