Tell you when you're older

Tell you when you're older or you're too young to know.... The most annoying statements made by parents. I realize that sometimes its the best answer if it is regarding something a child should not know about at a particular age... but please give me a break. How many of us remember exactly what it is we wanted to know at the time that statement is made... when we get older? I havent a clue... and as a parent and those out there as well... how well do you think you will remember when they come to you and ask when they are older ( if by some slim chance they DO remember) what it is they are talking about...lol


I hated hearing those words growing up... I realize that most times the parents know the kids wont remember anyways, so it is basically said as a write off so to speak.. or put off if you will. But you know, I think us as adults, tend to forget what it was like being a kid and always being curious about stuff in general. And I think we take kids for granted at times... I realize that not every child is in the same league, but we need to start giving them the benefit of the doubt. We need to listen more to what they have to say, even if it doesn make any sense to us at all... the fact is.. its important to them. I think as adults, a good majority ( as I realize this doesnt apply to everyone) tend to get so caught up in our own lives, that we forget what it was like to be young, that kids are people with feelings and wants and dreams just as we are...


I think if we took more time to listen to our kids, believed in our children, and took the time to reallyget to know them as individuals, we would have alot less problems with our youth today.. Of course not every child is going to straighten out by doing this, kids have outside issues as well, such as school, friends and so on... But what about believing your child, no matter what they tell you, at least until you either prove or disprove what they say. If you have a child that is known to lie alot.. maybe it is because they want positive attention, they are saying hey! Someone listen to me, believe in me, trust me.... because if we dont, then they never feel they can rely on anyone, even when they are telling the truth... the old never cry wolf scenario comes to mind...


I realize that times are hard now.. most families have 2 working parents ( if there is even 2 parenst in the home) or they work 2 jobs just to keep a roof over their chldrens heads, and food on the table, so you come home so tired the last thing you want to do is listen to chatter from kids that doesnt sound like it is anything important....


Also you have the goverment and the welfare system observing everything we do, and they have given kids a get out of troble free card, by saying ( paraphasing to suit this story) that if your parents do something you dont like... like you have to do your homework and you dont want to, or you want to go out someplace and your parents say no, I will just say they abused me and hey I get to do what I want, because you cant touch me and if you do I will tell... mind you, this is my words and my outlook of how it is... Dont get me wrong, I know their is alot of kids out there that DO get abused... and it isnt right... But heres a interesting story) (as in Ironic). A 19 year old girl gives birth to a baby girl. She tells the nurses and doctor, she doesnt want it, she wont be able to handle it, and she is afraid she will hurt the baby... They comfort her and tell her she is just scared and that is normal... she leaves with the infant.... a few days later the infant is dead... Society is really screwed up... some kids get taken out of their home for stupid reasons, and others get left in homes they should be removed from but dont, because nobody listens to them. Also good kids get ignored, because they dont do anything wrong, so that when they do need help, they are still ignored because everyone figures it will get worked out on its own.


We need to listen more to our kids, give them the benefit of the doubt, get close to them, talk to them, love them, and always make time for them, even if it is 10 minutes. 10 minutes is a lifetime to some kids.


And remember, most kids are smarter than you think and can understand alot more than you think they can. So before responding " I'll tell you when you are older...." Why not evaluate the situation... Take into consideration the age of the child, what the subject is about and if need be, explain to them outright that maybe you feel at this time they are too young to understand what is going on or what not.... Most children just want truth... not to be put aside with empty words..


Well went off onto a seperate soap box here.. but it all fits together in a way...
Please note.. not bashing the system all together.. sometimes it does alot of good.... just making note of some situations... and life in general in this world.