true poem of the pain of betrayal. |
DEATH IS BETTER THAN THIS I sit at your table drinking a coke knowing my world will go up in smoke Knowing exactly what you will say knowing you will destroy my soul today Why do you sit there wringing your hands? Say it you weak pathetic man I can hardly stand this waiting So I will you to make your play knowing exactly what you will say willing emotions to go away Then in a voice emotionally dead you say it a bomb goes off in my head You recall your sexcapade with that bitch from your past and my world shatters like fragments of glass Hollow words spill from your head it just happened I don't love her she means nothing you said and all I could think was you took NOTHING TO BED!!! I want to laugh I want to cry but most of all I want to die It would have been kinder to stick a knife in my heart slap me, do anything else but tear my world apart DAMN YOU! I HATE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I WISH YOU WHERE DEAD!! Conflicting thoughts run through my head But outwardly calm I sit sipping my coke with each sip I choke Then you stand up so calm so happy and you make a fatal error you look at me Hatred burns through my veins replacing the pain driving me insane hand on bottle bottle in hand I feel so dread that I could take this bottle and kill you -DEAD But ever the pretender I smile and you look at me as if you could die. "YOU BASTARD, SELF SERVING MAN!!" YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU I can hardly stand this hurting. GOD is this what hell is like? I can hardly breathe then you ask are you ready to leave? so with my last breath I whisper yes We leave your house forever for me we walk you talk you have so much to say I wish you would just shut to f**K up and just go away So I can think but instead I sink into nothingness Finally you leave my side I go to my best friends house and I still don't cry Ever the pretender She says all men are dogs they don't have a clue forget him your beautiful play the field that’s what she would do. I stare at her her words echo in my head I think "Is every body emotionally dead?" But I am to everyone what they want me to be so I smile at her and pretend it doesn't bother me But alone that night I cried and cried to know that my love had died Oh God this hurt I would rather be dead you have destroyed my heart I can't deal with this shit I don't know where to start Is this how love dies without one last kiss death is better than this. |