Silence

Silence.... a beautiful breath that refills our souls when the daily chaos of life seems to splinter and fragment us.

As a child I could never bare the silences. I filled them all with noise, chattering and singing to blot out the quiet moments. I took up the piano, sprinkling arpeggios and harmonies through the empty times. The music filled the quiet spaces and I would leave black muddy footprints on my schoolbooks...  scribbling random notes between uneven lines and my bleak attempt to reconstruct a recognizable treble clef. The scribbling created noise... the music filled my mind.

As I matured, I found a peacefulness in the silence.  I would search for it hoping to carve out a tiny moment each day for a quiet moment of reflection.

There was a time when I would walk along the dimly lit sidewalks, past houses whose curtained eyes were closed to the world, over footbridges and under trees. I would stand in the park, masked by dusk and the trunk of a majestic oak, amidst the shards of  light filtering through the leaves.. hidden for that moment from the city. Swings lay still in the darkness mocking daylight laughter and squeals of excitement from babes who long since, were sleeping in their beds. It was a time that seems a thousand light years away from the life I share with children that were but a dream for me back then.

It was in the silent night that I dreamed my larger than life dreams.  In the silence, the visions became clear and attainable.  Silence brought me closer to myself... closer to what I hoped would be my future.  It was a time to plan and prioritize and embrace.

I have never been afraid of the night or of the soundless echos that comes with it.  For me.. darkness brings with it a blanket of serene silence.  I love to walk the edge of the lake, sand absorbing each of my steps and only the rippling motion of the waves and the far cry of a sea gull can be heard.  The moon shines quietly, suspended in the star lit sky like a pendant on the end of a diamond chain.  In the silence, memories come to mind as I think about promises made... and later broken... to lasso the moon.  Silence should be a promise... a promise of unspokeness that is shattered the moment it is uttered aloud.  Or maybe.... a promise should be silent.  That I believe would be less disappointing.

Silence as a wonderful oxymoron is the most beautiful sound. It is the brief pause between movements of a symphony, as the final reverberating crash of the tympani sounds before the violins gently break forth their quivering aria and therein lies a stunningly breath taking second of tranquility. It is a lone silence, a noiselessness unbroken by voices, car alarms and white noise.

It is said that God speaks with a still, small voice. How are we to hear what he is saying if we never stop to listen? And how are we to hear our own intuition if we don't block out all of the extraneous noises with a few peaceful moments?  Silence truly is golden and it is the quiet moments which leave the deepest impressions in our lives.  Silence.....  can you hear it?