Secret Scars Group

Self Injury Is Not:

• Attention Seeking;
• Manipulation;
• For Pleasure;
• A Group Activity;
• Cool, a trend;
• An Adrenaline Rush;
• Tattooing, Body Piercing or part of BDSM sexual activities;
• A failed Suicide Attempt.

Self injury is a coping mechanism. An individual harms their physical self to deal with emotional pain, or to break feelings of numbness by arousing sensation..

© 2008 eNotAlone.com



Now that we have that out of the way, let’s discover what Self Injury is and many of the related facts.

Self injury is any deliberate, non suicidal behaviour that inflicts physical harm on your body and is aimed at relieving emotional distress. Physical pain is often easier to deal with than emotional pain, because it causes 'real' feelings. Injuries can prove to an individual that their emotional pain is real and valid. Self injurious behaviour may calm or awaken a person. Yet, self injury only provides temporary relief, it does not deal with the underlying issues. Self injury can become a natural response to the stresses of day to day life and can escalate in frequency and severity.

© 2008 eNotAlone.com


There are many ways of inflicting Self Injury. It can range between severe to mild acts of injury/mutilation and include the following:

1. cutting
2. branding
3. burning
4. carving
5. hair pulling
6. stabbing ones self with sharp objects
7. head banging
8. arm biting
9. interference with wound healing
10. limb amputation
11. castration



In the late 90’s, 160,000 people had admitted to acts of Self Injury/mutilation and 1 out of 10 teens have committed acts of Self Injury. It has also been found that and increasing number of males is admitting to such acts. Once believed that Self Injury was an affliction of the female gender alone, this accounts for the phenomenal number of teenagers and young men and women that are trying to cope with everyday situations in life.

Age of onset ranges from pre-teen to teenage, and many self injurers find that they lose the urge to harm themselves around their early thirties.

There is a growing number of older self injurers seeking support as they gain confidence with the medical establishments' acceptance of self injury.

© 2008 eNotAlone.com


Self Injurers will hide their scars and wounds. It’s a secret and hidden addiction that is performed in private. So the accusations that this is a form of manipulation or means of gaining attention, are unwarranted and truly sad.

WARNING TO PARENTS AND FRIENDS OF SELF INJURERS:

I will list a few ways to cause your teen or friend to withdraw and perform acts of Self Injury/mutilation more frequently.

1. badgering
2. punishment
3. harping on the subject
4. ranting about it
5. public embarrassment
6. refusing to listen
7. name calling
8. talking about it to friends and family in earshot or private


And many more that we’ve not listed. This is only a scrape of the iceberg of some of the things I’ve heard from Self Injurers that have occurred.

If you are engaging in ANY of above acts, in an attempt to make your teen or friend quit Self Injury, STOP! You are only adding to their stress and the emotional tail-spin that causes a teen or friend to perform Self Injury.

If you want to help, LISTEN!
Be there for them
You don’t have to understand
Let them talk it out
Hugs are always a good thing, but not if it’s forced on the individual. If they draw away, pull back and wait for them to feel comfortable.

Ok, more facts:

Medical Diagnosis

Self injury is not a distinct syndrome according to current diagnostic criteria, it is often a behaviour associated with syndromes such as Personality Disorders, Anxiety Disorders, Compulsive Disorders, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Dissociative Disorders, Eating Disorders, Impulse Control Disorders and forms of Depression.

People who self injure may not have a diagnosed disorder; in fact, they may be mentally healthy, and even outwardly happy. There is a strong link between low self esteem and self injury.

Self injury is a maladaptive coping mechanism, and health care workers may offer to teach new coping strategies to people relying on self injury.


Why Self Injury Helps People

When a person hurts himself or herself, it is because they are undergoing immense emotional distress, and their everyday ability to cope and function have failed. They may feel distressed, upset, uncomfortable, claustrophobic, anxious, depressed, helpless, powerless, out of control, or worthless. When under such pressure, any task, even simple tasks are impossible to perform; so, to regain their composure, and to find some small area of control, they hurt themselves.

It is not always the pain that is sought; physical pain is easier to deal with than the emotional pain being experienced. The physical pain may not even be fully felt, as some people disassociate from the pain and even from their bodies, and it takes self injury for them to 'wake up'.

Self injury provides a very real focus, it quietens the mind, create space to think clearly, and is a small area of life that can be controlled.

Many people who self injure feel that their life is not under their control, there are 'powerful others' with authority over them. People who are constantly invalidated by people in positions of respect or authority lose their self esteem. Self injurers often have to deal with being chronically ignored or being made to feel inadequate. Self injury provides a release for pent up frustrations, it takes the emotional hurt inflicted upon them and transforms it into something 'real'.

Self injury may protect a person from thoughts of suicide, it may reduce anxiety, relieve distress, awaken a person from sloth or depression, or reduce the hearing of hallucinogenic voices. Self injury is a personal coping mechanism, relied upon for often personal reasons.


Words

Self Injury may be referred in many ways, if a self injurer labels their behaviour in a different way to your expectations, do not correct their terminology, instead, adapt your own.

Self Injury (SI); Self Harm (SH); Self Inflicted Violence (SIV); Self Injurious Behaviour (SIB); Self Mutilation (SM); Cutting; Burning; Branding; Over Dosing (OD).


© 2008 eNotAlone.com


Self Injury as an addiction:

1) BECOMING A HABITUAL SELF INJURER IS A PROGRESSIVE PROCESS

2) The first incident of self-injury may occur by accident, or after finding out about others who engage in this behavior

a) The person has strong feelings such as anger, fear or anxiety before an injuring event

b) These feelings build, and the person has no way to express or address them directly

3) The next time a similar strong feeling arises, the person has been “conditioned” to seek relief in the same way

a) The person feels compelled to repeat self-harm, which is likely to increase in frequency and degree

b) The person hides the tools used to injure, and covers up the evidence, often by wearing long sleeves

4) Cutting or other self-injury provides a sense of relief; a release of the mounting tension

a) A feeling of guilt and shame usually follows the event

b) The feelings of shame paradoxically lead to continued self-injurious behavior

5) Endorphins, specifically enkephalins, contribute to the 'addictive’ nature of self-injury

a) When a person injures themselves endorphins are released in the body and function as natural pain killers

b) The behavior may become addictive because the person learns to associate the act of self-injury with the positive feelings they get when endorphins are released in their system

c) The use of SSRI medications (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors) such as Prozac and Zoloft, may be helpful in increasing brain serotonin levels and reducing self-injury in cases of moderate to severe depression


Above information from www.helpguide.org


For the Self Injurer


Ways to stop:

If you feel the urge to injure yourself, below is a list of suggestions that might help you to overcome that urge. Please be advised that not all of these suggestions will be helpful to everyone. What is helpful to one person, may not be helpful to someone else. These suggestions have been provided by individuals who self injured and what they found helpful to them. If you feel that a certain suggestion may in fact cause you to want to self injure even more, do NOT use that suggestion. Find ones that are helpful for you. Again, these are only suggestions and may not be helpful to everyone.

• deep breathing
• relaxation techniques
• call a friend, your therapist or a crisis line
• Try not to be alone (visit a friend, go shopping, etc.)
• take a hot bath
• listen to music
• go for a walk
• write in a journal
• wear an elastic around wrist and snap it when you have the urge to harm yourself
• some people find it helpful to draw red lines on themselves with washable markers instead of cutting themselves
• hold ice cubes in your hands - the cold causes pain in your hands, but it is not dangerous or harmful (some people find it relieves the urge to harm themselves for that moment)
• Punching a bed or a pillow (when nothing but a physical outlet for your anger and frustration will work).
• Scratch draw a picture on a thick piece of wood or use a screw driver and stab at the piece of wood. (can be another physical way to release your emotions without harming yourself.)
• Avoid temptation (i.e. avoiding the area in CVS where the razor blades are kept, etc.)
• Try to find your own creative ways as outlets for emotions.
• learn to confront others/making your own feelings known instead of keeping them inside
• go outside and scream and yell
• Take up a sport (a form of exercise can help you release tension, etc.)
• work with paint, clay, play-doo, etc. (the person who suggested this mentioned that they would make a big sculpture and do whatever they wanted to it. They said it was helpful to calm the urge to self-injure, plus it gave them some idea of what might be underlying the pain.
• draw a picture of what or who is making you angry
• instead of harming yourself, try massaging the area you want to harm with massage oils or creams, reminding yourself that you are special and you deserve to treat yourself and your body with love and respect
• go to church or your place of worship
• Wear a pipe cleaner or something that will fit on the places that you injure. One person did this as a way to remind herself that she could call someone instead of hurting herself and that she had other ways to cope.
• Break the object that you use to self-injure as a way to show that you have control over it.
• Write a letter to the person(s) that have hurt you and express how they made you feel. Theses letters do not have to be in perfect form and you do not have to please anyone but yourself. You do not have to give these letters to the people, but it is a great way to release the feelings that you are carrying within. After you write the letters, you can decide then what to do with them. Some people find destroying the letters help (i.e. tear them up, throw them in a lake, etc.)
• do some household chores (i.e. cleaning)
• do some cooking
• Try some sewing, cross-stitch, etc.
• recite a poem, prayer or anything else familiar the comforts you multiple times
• write down all your positive points and why you do not deserve to be hurt
• write in your journal why you want to hurt yourself and if you have hurt yourself, write down what caused it to happen so in the future you can prevent it from happenings - or find out what your triggers were
• Play some kind of musical instrument. Even if you don't really know how to play, picking out tunes is a way to concentrate and help get rid of the urge to harm yourself.
• yoga
• Allow yourself to cry. Getting the tears out can make you feel better. It allows the inside to release, as opposed to self abuse. Picture your "ickies" pouring out as you cry.
• Take a shower
• Write down a word best associated with what you are feeling (i.e. horrible, sad, lonely, angry) and continue to write it down, over and over. Sometimes when you do that, the words looks silly etc., and it puts humor or a smile in your life.
• Sing a song on what you are feeling. It's another way to get it outside. Shout if you are made, etc. Let the words just come to you.
• Scribble on paper. Clutch the pen in your fist. It's a way to diffuse it on to paper. (Get a few sheets so they don't tear.)
• Take item you are self injuring with and use it against something else. For example, if you are using a razor blade, rip it across a towel. Sometimes seeing what "can" be done to an object can make a person think twice about using it on themselves. Can also give the feeling of "doing it"...the tangible aspect.
• Make a list of reasons why you are going to stop cutting. Every time you get the urge, read the list to remind yourself why you shouldn't. Also remember to put on that list that you do not deserve to hurt yourself. You are important and special and you do not deserve to be hurt.

by Colleen Thompson


Some helpful links:

thefunnys

http://groups.msn.com/thefunnys/depressionfacts.msnw?action=get_message&mview=0&...

eNotAlone

http://www.enotalone.com/article/3002.html

Self Injury Awareness Booklet

http://www.enotalone.com/article/3001.html

Self Injury Treatments and Self Help

http://www.enotalone.com/article/3003.html

Self Injury: First Aid for External Injuries, Scars

http://www.enotalone.com/article/3004.html

Living with Self Injury

http://www.enotalone.com/article/3005.html

About LifeSIGNS. Sources of Information and Support
About LifeSIGNS. Sources of Information and Support