A woman finds a letter from her husband, one she does not want to read |
The girl walked in slowly, kicking the door open with her foot and lighting a candle with her hands. She let her eyes adjust to the dimly lit room; shortly afterwards she saw the letter, perched neatly on the edge of the table. It sat there, violently, penetrating into her darkest thoughts and deepest fears. The letter sat, tempting and vigorous, perturbing her memories of when it was a loving embrace between her and her only saviour. The letter sat there staring and screaming at her to stay away and save her fragile soul. It was addressed to her “My love”, perfect calligraphy placed neatly in the middle of the folded envelope. Her frail fingers touched the letter, and she picked it up. It weighs no more than a feather yet she feels it’s too heavy to place in her palm. Her thin fingers are cold, and it makes the opening much harder. She opens the letter and it cuts her finger slightly. She notices only when she sees a red dot on the tip of the folded edge. She stares for a moment at the manilla coloured object. It was so thin that she could see the inked letters through the two folds. It was cold in the room and she could see her breath, she focused on her breathing as she opened the two neatly joined edges. Clearly written in the middle of the paper, with precise handwritten loops, screamed two words that awaited her. Two words to break her heart, two words to make her feel like her world has come undone, two words to make her believe that love did not exist anywhere in the world, or, at least in hers. She dropped to the floor and was too choked too cry or even gasp. She sat there, in the cold, the dark room and stared at the wooden floor. The floor that looked ever so inviting, she pressed her frail fingers against the timber and released a sigh. She sat there for a moment, enjoying the soft numb she felt before the pain really kicked in, the pain that started from her heart and spread throughout her body. She hit the floor, not yet crying. She held in her sanity for three seconds until she released into breaking sobs upon the hardwood. Around her was no longer cold, it was the same temperature as her because she slowly became numb. The numbness made her feel slightly better, but her tears slightly stung her face, enough for her to realize that the pain was still there waiting. Waiting for her to join it so it could whisper its uncanny thoughts into her ear and tell her the love was not real. Her love that she thought of day and night and hereafter. The third emotion was regret. Regret for letting herself fall viscously in love so quickly. Her heart exploded and bled out on the floor. But she was not bleeding, no; she was just so very cold. Those words made her realize that her future was broken, and her past no longer existed. It made here come to see that her present should no longer be enjoyed. It made her recognize her life didn’t matter anymore and that her problems would be better off not living in a world where happiness existed. Her vision was blurred from the crying as she opened her eyes. She was no longer in a place alone; she had a woman standing over her. A woman with no eyes just a face and smooth skin where her eyes should be. She leaned down to the floor and gripped her hand. She kissed it softly and suddenly she felt warmth again. Her eyes no longer felt puffy and her chest no longer felt pain. For a moment she thought she could have imagined the letter but then she tasted the salt on her lips from her tears. Then she thought she might have imagined the magical figure but she was there in her memory. Tall, blond, and without eyes yet a kind smile made especially for her and her pain. She picked up the letter again and bravely looked at the two words once more. ; “No regret” was hand written on the dingy paper. She folded up the letter and left it on the floor as she got up and made her way out into the cold winter’s air, braving a face for her angel. |