e-love (Chapter 12)

12

He wrote: “I love you - What are we going to do about all this?”

and…

…by coincidence, some days ago, she had thought about how long had she been waiting for something magical like this to happen?

There are people that are always waiting. Waiting. Always waiting. They... wait, wait, wait, and wait.

Was she one of those people? Waiting forever and doing nothing? Only waiting and waiting until you s t o p waiting? Why do some people really like feeling (or being) miserable? Was it some type of UNIVERSAL ORDER RULE? When was the last day that she was really, really happy? She couldn’t remember…Or, when was the last day she really, really did something for her? Well… she went to the movies last Sunday evening, had popcorn with Guaraná (Ohhh everybody needed to try Guaraná once) and enjoyed herself a lot. But, was this guaraná-popcorn-movie evening that magic thing that she was really waiting for?

No.

Was she going to allow the magic to happen?

Yes.

Christina looked up at the screen as the hero declared his love for the heroine, and sighed. She popped another piece of guaraná popcorn in her mouth, savouring the [what?] flavour. Butchie had declared his love for her, but she'd miss the tastes of Brazil if she left to be with him. Still, a movie on her own didn't satisfy, did it? Christina looked up to see the hero and heroine celebrating their happy ever after. That could be her. She could be the heroine in her own romance story if she took a chance. Couldn't she?

She thought about the “What are we going to do about this?” that he had written to her. He was right. It was time for decisions, for some serious decision making. She had been divorced for 8 years now and her wonderful, beautiful, loving daughters were grown up and were both well off, graduated and working hard, with good careers ahead of them, each living in different Brazilian states; in São Paulo, Claudia and in Fortaleza, Sylvia. All was ok. She had her own life, her own apartment (fully paid for), her own car (fully paid for), her things, her daily routine, her free-lance job as a Language Teacher with a good income, great students and free time, all bills taken care of in the end of the month, money carefully managed as well as some money religiously saved in her savings account. She was secure, protected, and well. She felt good.

She remembered her last Skype conversation with her daughters a week ago:

"Mom, we're both grown up now! We've graduated, we've got careers... This isn't like it was with Dad - I know you stayed with him for our sakes. But we're grown up now. It's time for you to do something just for you. Take a chance. Give Butchie a chance."

Christina opened her mouth to reply, but Sylvia didn't give her a chance to speak.

"Claudia and I just want you to be happy, Mom. Do it. Tell him you'll meet up and give this relationship a real chance!"

Should She? She didn’t need to worry about an irresponsible husband anymore that couldn’t control money in his hands (and it ran like running water…) and whose motto was: “Spend now, worry later!” She could still remember the day when she asked him for the check book, the credit cards and the home keys, asking him to leave for good and take with him his deeds, his irresponsibilities, his dreams of becoming a millionaire for the 10th time in a row, by spending money which they didn’t have and jeopardizing their lives and the family’s future.  She should have noticed this on the very first time she left him and not going back to him, as she did, for the sake of the girls and their marriage. When it’s wrong, it’s wrong. You should not insist on what is not right since the very first time.

She was healthy and young, walked for 2 hours once a week, hated Gyms and the sweat in the air, loved the fresh air in the City’s Park, the lakes, the ducks swimming, the trees, the grass and nature but especially the sunshine. She also liked to feel the men’s eyes on her and watching her walk and listening to her favorite songs on her iPod, with her nice average-looking body for a woman her age. She could also feel some women checking her out and Brasilia was known for that now; many lonely women out there. Gays, lesbians, whatever, she didn’t mind it. You need to be yourself. Couples divorced a lot in Brasilia. Was it maybe the fact that the city didn’t have a beach nearby as many other Brazilian cities, so you got bored??? Or because it was the Capital City, full of congressmen, businessmen, lobbyists, single men, and single women???? Yet, it was a great city to live in, full of places to go to, malls and restaurants, the famous Brazilian steak houses where you would eat the best meat ever – Picanha!; be waited on like a king/queen and with real care and not having impolite waiter throwing the plates in front of you, only working for the tips! One thing was true: she loved Brazil and its gentle people, the Brazilian warmth and sweetness, the weather, the beaches, the so many contradictions, the opposites yet no real hatred, bias or confusions, a country that never declared war to another, a country that was peaceful and happy with kind, loving people. Brazil and BRIC, an acronym for the economies of Brazil, Russia, India and China combined. The general consensus now is that by 2050 these four economies would be wealthier than most of the current major economic powers.  Brazil, not considered underdeveloped anymore but developed and a risk-free investment country. She was proud of this as a Brazilian. Brazil. She did love this magnificent, enormous and different country. And she would miss it…if she had to go away.



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