Where Do I Go?

All this pain I feel inside
Is almost impossible to hide.
But now I live behind my mask,
Just hoping no one will ever ask
Why I seem so so different now...

All those times you said "I love you,"
Were you saying it to him too?
So many tings bouncing in my head
When I was told you had said
That you had feelings for him now...

Where am I supposed to go from here,
When all I want is to sense you near...
I can feel my joy begin to decline,
Though your happiness means so much more than mine...
And for you I'm willing to sacrifice it all...

I don't know how to act or what to do,
I don't want to let my pain affect you too...
Some ask "To be or not to be,"
But "To love or not to love" is more for me...
Around my heart I have begun to build a wall...

I thought they were each my friend,
Now I know that group was just pretend.
All these lies you cram right down my throat,
What if I confronted you on your every quote?
Would you finally cave and confess your lie?

Would the truth just hurt me more than I am?
I don't know what is real and what is a sham...
Could it really all be from false hope in my mind?
Maybe all this time I have looked at the truth like I was blind.
Why does it all seem to have gone awry?...