What I fear.

I read someone's story of what it was that they feared, and I began to wonder what it was that scared me, I thought of two things that could be put on this list and under further examination I realized that there was only one.

The one I thought I was afraid of was needles. I hate them. Whenever I think of needles I can practically feel them getting pushed into my arm. I Cringe even as I write this. I can feel the needle pushing itself through ym skin and into my veins. It creeps me out. I realized however that I'm not really afraid of needles, just creeped out by them. I can handle getting a needle, I just don't like it.

The thing that scares me more than anything else is death. I'm terrified by the concept that one day I'm no longer going to exist. that everything I am is going to be gone. Once I die that's it, there'll be nothing left and that is the most terrifying than anything I can imagine. IF I could arrange it so that I live forever, I would do it in a heartbeat. I know that once I'm dead it won't be a big deal anymore, because I won't actually be able to feel anything anymore, won't be able to be afraid. I just can't accept the oblivion that comes after life.

Honestly I'm scared and I don't know what to do about it. I want to live forever but I can't. Everything I know, Everyone I love will no longer exist to me when I'm dead. I'll lose everything. and that is the worst thing I could possibly imagine.