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Rated: E · Sample · Fanfiction · #2015619
Welcome to the Golden Age of Heroes--today! Feat. the new origin of the first Flash!
ALL-STAR



Secret Origin


PAGE 1: Four large, horizontal panels down the page. Each one is layered so that it's all pieces of the same image, leading down a path. The whole picture won't be there, but there will be enough details to make it clear: something terrible has happened.

(Panel)1. Top of the page, we have a silhouette illuminated by flames in the background. Though we won't get a good shot of it now, this is the new version of the ULTRA-HUMANITE. He will appear hulking and massive, beyond anything human. Winged monstrosities can be spotted in the sky above him, and rubble surrounds him. When the UH speaks, his voice rumbles, which could be reflected in the word balloon.

UH: I warned you, did I not? I told you what would happen if you dared interfere!


2. Going down the page, we see more of the ruined building the UH has arrived at. The flames and dim lighting illuminate the rubble, revealing certain elements sticking out of the dark. We can see a GOLDEN BOOT, a fallen soldier or two, and a broken desk, draped over which is a PALE ARM.

UH: You dared to meddle with powers beyond your ken, and what did it get you? A painful, slow end to your life.


3. Further in, where there is (slightly) less damage, we can see more soldiers, a BLUE GLOVE sticking out from the shadows, a pair of YELLOW FIREMAN PANTS, and a trail of green flame.

UH: All your efforts to stop this were pointless. All that time spent gathering forces, just to see them broken apart when they were needed most...


4. Finally, we hit a wall, literally. We can see the tips of SILVER WINGS peeking out of the darkness, a GREEN FLAME underneath a pile of rubble, and a pair of overturned RUNNING SHOES beside it. Lying at the end of all the destruction, we get a faint glimpse of a crumpled figure against a wall.

UH: ...it must tear you up inside. Finally, you realize--


PAGE 2: Two panels, with the first one taking up two-thirds of the page.

1. Close-up on the crumpled figure against the wall, and we get our first shot of THE SANDMAN. He is wearing a (now tattered and torn) black suit with a purple vest underneath a faintly purple trench coat. His traditional fedora is missing, and his golden gas mask is broken, revealing a black eye. We cannot see his hair, as its covered up by some kind of black hood.

UH: --no one can stop me!


2. Below the first panel, we have a ceiling shot of a man lying wide awake in bed, drawing in a notebook. This man is WESLEY DODDS, a black man in his EARLY 50s--think Djimon Hounsou in another year or two. Bald on top, he has a graying goatee at his chin. He is wearing a pair of striped boxers and a stained tank-top. What little we can see of his room suggests that it is a mess--disheveled sheets, overflowing waste basket, and a pile of clothes next to a hamper. There are three coffee mugs lying beside him on a cheap nightstand--all empty.

WD: Hrm...


PAGE 3: Six panels--Panels 4 will overlap Panel 5. As we go down the page, we'll get to see some of Wesley's thoughts. Whenever his thoughts come up in captions, it would be cool if they were represented as scribbling on paper. Even cooler, it could be scratchy, like someone who's jittery and having a hard time holding a pencil.

1. Close-up of WESLEY'S hand as he tears the sheet from his notebook. If we can fit it, perhaps we can hint at what's on the page. It's the same shot from PAGE 2, Panel 1, albeit a sketch.

CAPTION: Not good. Fifth dream I've had like that. Fifth dream where we LOSE.


2. WESLEY slides off his bed, paper in hand. He casts his head down as he looks over the illustration in his hand.

CAP: Same place, same time, same ending. What's missing?


3. As he walks away from his bed, we can see more of his room. There is a bulletin board filled with newspaper clippings and pictures, some with red Xs drawn over them and others with green question marks beside them. His closet door has a coat hanging from it--the PURPLE TRENCH COAT from PAGE 2, Panel 1.

CAP: Different players? More? Less? No, no...


4. Another close-up on his hand as he pins the illustration, now in full view, to a different board. We catch the glimpses of other such illustrations just outside the panel.

5. Close on WESLEY'S face as he surveys the board and scowls at the connections he sees. From this shot, we can see he has bags under his eyes and his cheeks are starting to sag.

CAP: Must not get ahead. Step 1--


6. Cut to the new board, full of bizarre illustrations that are all seemingly random, but will play out as the story goes on. We have HERMES descending through a window, a TRAIN exploding in GREEN FLAME, a WINGED FIGURE illuminated by the moon, a GOLD ANKH burnt onto a brick wall, a MUSHROOM CLOUD, a HOURGLASS nestled in a box and a hand reaching for it, and a DEAD BODY floating in water on its belly. Other, less defined illustrations and scribbles can fill the board, but these should have the most detail.

CAP: --must make connections. How? Need to investigate further. Need to--


PAGE 4: Six panels. Change scenes to a new location, a laboratory in KEYSTONE UNIVERSITY, Kansas. It's nothing particularly fancy or futuristic--little more than the average a college could afford. There are displays lining the hall, each one featuring something different. Bones in one, past research equipment in another, etc.

1. Our first shot of the new, younger JAY GARRICK carrying a binder under his arm. He's a young white male, no more than 21, and has brown hair combed almost neatly--a few strands stick out here and there. He's wearing a pair of khakis, a button-up shirt, and a lab coat, all of which are a little wrinkled. There is an ID badge hanging askew around his neck. His whole look should be like a guy who just got out of bed and didn't bother to do more than the bare minimum before going to work. We cannot see her yet, but his boss, PROFESSOR HARRIET HUGHES, is shouting at him from off-panel.

CAP: KEYSTONE UNIVERSITY


HH: Wake up, Mr. Garrick!


JG: Huh-whuh?


2. Pan out to reveal the rest of the scene, with HARRIET in full view. She's an older white woman, mid-50s, with graying blonde hair pulled into a bun. Her outfit, a blouse, slacks, and lab coat, are pressed and spotless, unlike JAY's. As she glares down JAY, she has a deep scowl adding to the lines on her face. JAY does not seem threatened by her, as he stifles a yawn.

JG: Aw geez, I'm sorry, Professor Hughes. I didn't get much sleep last night...I was busy--


HH: --talking with your girlfriend, I assume?


JG: Yeah, actually. How'd you guess?


HH: Because that's been your excuse for the last few weeks. And I am getting tired of hearing it every other day.


3. JAY shrugs off HARRIET'S words and offers a lazy smile. He has the air of your standard slacker, like nothing fazes him. HARRIET, for her part, narrows her eyes at the young man--she should be used to this by now, but it still frustrates her when he acts like this.

JG: Can't help if we've got such a big time-zone difference, y'know? She's just waking up, I'm going to sleep, and that's about the only time we can really talk.


HH: I suppose you can't help that...


4. HARRIET does an about-face and makes a veiled threat to JAY, which manages to shock him enough to drop the slacker act for a moment. He fumbles after her.

HH: ...just like I can't help changing my assistants. If your mind isn't on the heavy water project, I can always find someone else to take your place.


JG: Whoa, whoa! No need to do that, Professor! My mind's on it--heavy water is all I think about! It's all I live for right now. Heavy water is life.


HH: Replace 'heavy water' with 'Joan Crawford' and I might believe you.


5. As the two walk down the hallway, HARRIET carries herself with cold efficiency and JAY slumps along with drooping shoulders.

JG: Professor, it's not that. It's...it's hard sometimes. We've got a lot to talk about and I want to make this work out, but...


HH: "But" what?


JG: I don't know if I have what it takes to make her happy.


6. HARRIET turns her head slightly while JAY casts his down.

HH: What makes you say that?


JG:It's, um...well...


PAGE 5: The first seven panels will be smaller than the ones at the bottom of the page. They are flashbacks, so perhaps they could be tinted to suggest they have already occurred? Maybe in a red or yellow tone.

1. We see JAY in the middle of football try-outs, and he is outpacing almost all other hopefuls. We also get our first glimpse of JOAN CRAWFORD in the stands, cheering for her man. She's much more put together than JAY was in his first appearance: tidy clothes, well-done hair, etc. JOAN has a blonde pixie cut, something like Carey Mulligan, and she is somewhat overweight, with a top-heavy physique. It's summer, so JOAN and JAY should be dressed for the part: shorts, tank-tops, and for JAY, cleats.

2. Later, on the same field, we see JAY standing by the bench in a polo and khakis. He's got a clipboard in his hand, suggesting that he is working as the team manager. He seems happy enough with the situation, unlike JOAN, who can be seen not too far from him. She is disappointed that for such talent, he has settled for an assistant position.

3. At a different time, we see JAY and JOAN sitting in an apartment as they look over papers at a coffee table--it's time to decide on where to go for an internship. JAY is dressed very casual--in fact, maybe he should be in pajama pants and a jersey. JOAN is more business casual--polo shirt, jeans, and sneakers. As JAY looks over the papers, JOAN is gesturing and making suggestions of locations. In word balloons, we can see the CERN facility, a National Laboratory campus (Los Alamos, Lawrence Livermore, etc.), and the von Karman Institute.

4. Cut to sometime later, where we have JAY heading to an academic building labeled 'LAMPERT BUILDING'. He has his lab coat on and a backpack over that, and he's waving goodbye to JOAN. She waves too, albeit with that same disappointed look on her face.

5. Cut to another time, where we see JAY and JOAN eating at a fast food restaurant--the sign behind them reads 'BIG BELLY BURGER' and features a chubby chef licking his lips. The two of them are dressed casually again, and JAY has actually bothered to throw on a red polo and jeans. They look happy as they eat rather sizable burgers.

6. Cut to a later date, where we see them at the same table. JAY is wearing the same clothes as before and is eating the same big burger, while JOAN has a smaller burger (or maybe a chicken sandwich), and she is looking nonplussed about being there.

7. Cut to even later, and we have JAY and JOAN eating at the same table. JAY is still munching on his burger like Jughead, but JOAN is picking at a meager salad. She has a very sour look on her face, compared to her boyfriend and the people around them.

8. Cut back to the present, where we have JAY tilting his head up, as if looking at the flashbacks to jog his memory. He has a furrowed brow as he thinks of what to say, while the PROFESSOR has almost softened her expression.

JG: I guess I don't know if I'm the kind of guy she wants.

HH: Mr. Garrick, I assume you've heard the expression 'Anything worth having is worth working for', so my suggestion would be stop worrying--


PAGE 6: Eight panels. Panels 1 and 2, and 7 and 8 are to overlap--otherwise, no specific arrangement for the panels.

1. Large panel. PROFESSOR HUGHES opens the door into the school lab, which is modestly decorated from what we can see. Cabinets full of beakers, bottles, and gauges, fireproof tables, and an eye-wash station are nearby. There is nothing 'super' about this science lab--at least, not yet. Far off in the panel, we can see HUGHES and JAY by the door.

HH (connects to text in Panel 2): --and get working!


2. Close up on JAY and HUGHES. The PROFESSOR is rather proud of her remark, while JAY is bemused.

JG: Is that supposed to be for Joan and me or the heavy water?

HH: I'll let you be the judge of that. Go get the samples, because it's time to get to work!


3. JAY and HUGHES set down to work. While he pulls a variety of tools from a cabinet, she is checking them off on a clipboard.

CAP: And so, like poetry in motion...


4. Cut to another prep scene, where JAY is heating a beaker over a flame and HUGHES is sorting through a set of different-colored vials.

CAP: ...or elements in harmony...


5. Another cut. This time, JAY is stirring the water with a rod while adding in a yellow-green liquid. HUGHES is standing off to the side, making notes on her clipboard.

CAP: Jay and Professor Hughes work well into the afternoon.


6. Cut to JAY writing in his notebook while studying the changes in the water. He is much more determined than he first appeared, and HUGHES is visibly impressed. She is not the only one--JAY has a thought bubble over his head, and he is imagining JOAN watching over him. JOAN is very impressed by how hard her boyfriend is working.

7. Another close-up, this time of HUGHES' pocket, where we can see the outline of her phone vibrating.

CAP: Until, abruptly...


8. Pull out to reveal the two again. HUGHES is looking at her phone now, and she is biting her fingernail in frustration. JAY glances up from his work with a smile, and the thought bubble vanishes from above him.

HH: Oh, fiddlesticks...

JG: Something the matter, Prof?

HH: It's Dr. Clariss--he just said he needs to see me right away. The little weasel probably wants to steal some assignments and test materials again.

JG: Dr. Clueless needs help running his class again?

HH: Yes, yes he does.


PAGE 7: Eight panels. The last six could be layered like a text thread--start up top on the left, move down to the right, down to the left, and so on. JAY and JOAN start texting one another, and this should be represented by hovering caption boxes. WHITE for JOAN, GREEN for JAY.

1. HUGHES turns back to JAY and raises an eyebrow in curiosity, while JAY has an assured grin on his face.

HH: I don't know how long this will take, so we might as well call it a day here. Can you clean up here without me around?

JG: I'll have it so clean, you could eat your lunch off the tables.


2. Satisfied, HUGHES heads to the door with a small smile on her face. Behind her, JAY waves her off while picking up a beaker or two with his other hand.

HH: Excellent. I'll see you tomorrow, Mr. Garrick.

JG: See ya, Prof!


3. As soon as HUGHES is out of the room, JAY pulls out his phone and starts to type a message. We might not be able to see much of it, but let's give him a funky or multi-colored cell phone case--that way, it stands out as more than just a rectangle.

CAP: Hey babe, you up?


4. Cut to JOAN in her apartment. It's the middle of the night, and she is curled up in bed in an apartment, working on a laptop. She is dressed in a blouse and a pair of black jeans. Behind her is a sort of motivational poster--something about love, family, friends. On the nightstand beside her is a stack of magazines and newspapers, all with Japanese text on them. When she reads JAY'S text, she has a groggy look in her eyes, and doesn't look too happy to be seeing a message from him.

CAP: Kyoto, Japan--5 A.M.

CAP2: Not by choice. What is it?


5. Back to JAY. He has taken a step back and is taking a picture of the lab equipment.

CAP: Just wanted to say hey. We got a lot done in the lab today--we're making some real progress.


6. JOAN again. She can see the picture, and she cracks a small smile at the work being done.

CAP: Nice. Does Dr. Hughes know you're texting in the middle of work?


7. JAY turns around and backs up toward the table. He has a goofy grin on his face--he is happy to be having a discussion without arguing. The second caption will be at the bottom of the panel and will follow after JOAN'S first caption in a Z-shape.

CAP: She's gone, and so I can say goodbye to heavy water and hello to you. Besides, I think I'm onto a breakthrough--I think that gets me a reward.

CAP2: Or maybe I just needed to really talk to you.


8. JOAN smiles and sets her laptop to one side while she texts. Her second caption will rest near the bottom of the panel and finish the Z-shape.

CAP: And you wanted to spend it texting me? Lucky me.

CAP2: That's a first. But sure, let's talk.


PAGE 8: Six panels. Panel 4 is going to be much larger than the others--it'll be the big shot of the page.

1. JAY leans back onto the table, and we see him nudge the equipment. He does not notice, so wrapped up is he in his conversation. We won't see JOAN, but her messages will appear. They will be labeled CAPJC.

CAPJG1: I thought about what you said last night. You're right. I'm lazy, and I settle for what's easiest. I've always been like that. And I don't like it either.

CAPJC: I never said you were lazy, Jay.

CAPJG2: Well, I'm saying it. I want you to know that I'm going to do something about it, starting in the lab. I'm going to ace this internship. I'm going to apply to a bunch of labs.

CAPJG3: And when you get back, I'm going to take you to this new, fancy Italian place in town. You still like Italian, right?

CAPJC2: Yeah...


2. Close up on the LAB EQUIPMENT, as JAY tips it over. The beakers and bottles fall out and away from their restraints, towards the floor.

CAPJG: And I'll talk with coach about getting in some training, so I can be ready for try-outs next year. I want to be someone you're proud of, Joan. Starting today.


3. Pull back to the front of JAY. The equipment falls behind him with a sickening crash, which catches his attention. His eyes snap open with realization and shock.

CAPJC: You shouldn't change because of me, Jay.

CAPJG: I should and I will. You deserve better than what I can do right now, Joan.


4. Big, wide shot--this is the moment where everything changes. JAY spins around, horrified, and sees all the broken bottles and beakers behind him. GREEN and YELLOW liquid is all over the table, dripping onto the floor. Thick plumes of vapor rise up from the mess.

5. Cut to JAY covering his mouth with his sleeve as he rushes to the door. The vapor is growing thicker and thicker around him as it spreads at a rapid rate.

CAPJC: Jay, I know we argue and we fight, but I don't want to be the reason you change. You should change because you want to, not because I want you to.


6. As he races for the exit, JAY'S eyes droop low. The room has filled with a thick, hazy fog of yellow and green, such that nothing else can be seen.

CAPJC: But you have no idea how happy I am to hear this. I always believed in you Jay, even if it didn't seem like it.


PAGE 9: Nine panels. Panels 2-4 come one right after the other, layered atop each other.

1. JAY slumps over at a table. His eyes are struggling to stay open, and he can hardly keep himself standing.

CAPJC: If you want to change, I will help you in any way I can, even if I'm all the way over here. We'll figure out what to do.


2. Close up on JAY'S hand as he grasps the table side.

3. The hand moves closer to the edge, and the knuckles are not holding so firm.

4. JAY all but lets go, with just his fingertips on the tabletop.

CAPJC: Thank you, thank you for finally talking to me about this. You're not as bad at this as you thought.


5. Pull out to reveal JAY struggling to hold onto the table as he sinks to his knees. His sleeve no longer covers his mouth, as his other hand is planted on the floor.

6. Finally, JAY lets go of the table, and his body stretches out as he falls down.

CAPJC: I love you, Jay. I want you to know that.


7. Wide shot as we see JAY collapsed on the floor, face-down. His phone lies a distance away from him, but the screen still shines with activity.

CAPJC: Jay? Are you still there?


8. Pan out to reveal more of the room, as we back up towards a window on the far side of the room.

CAPJC: Jay?


9. Pan out further to outside the window, where we can no longer see Jay due to the smoke. It is early evening, and a shadow stretches over the building side.

CAP: 1 MISSED MESSAGE


PAGE 10: Six panels. Panel 3 will be the biggest--this is the moment where JAY'S story takes a turn for the strange.

1. Same shot as PAGE 9, PANEL 9, only now, a golden light is reflected in the glass of the window.

2. Cut back to the room, where JAY remains prone on the floor. The light has grown closer now, and it is absolutely brilliant--almost divine in nature. Wink wink, nudge nudge.

3. Wide shot as the golden figure of HERMES crashes through the window. This version of the Greek god is a little different than other interpretations: he will have the physique of someone like Usain Bolt--long, limber, but not overly muscular. This is a god that look built more for running than direct fighting. He is wearing his traditional helmet and winged sandals, but the wings on both are stylized to something less like a wing and more like the letter E. On top of that, he is wearing a loincloth joined with a sash over his left shoulder. In his hands is the caduceus.

4. The gas exits out the broken window, but HERMES pays that no mind as he sets down beside JAY. He is absolutely luminescent--he radiates light all over the cloudy room. Perhaps we could show that somehow with his text or word balloon? Something to show that he does not sound normal.

HM: Just in time. Another minute and the poor man would be lost.


5. HERMES kneels down beside JAY and turns the young man over. JAY'S face is turning a different color due to the lack of clean air coming in.

HM: Not that there was any danger of that--I am always on time.


6. Once JAY is on his back, HERMES touches the caduceus to the young man's chest. The tip of the staff glows with the same divine light, and it bathes what we can see of JAY'S body.

HM: Rise, Jay Garrick. I would have words with you.


PAGE 11: Nine panels. In the third panel, HERMES will explain matters to JAY, accompanied by images behind him--this should be reflected in a color change.

1. JAY coughs and sputters as he props himself up on his elbow. His face returns to its normal color, illuminated though it is by HERMES.

SFX: KAFF! HAK! HOF!

HM (off-panel): Catch your breath, that you might better hear what I say.


2. When he has almost recovered, JAY glances up to HERMES with droopy eyes. He is still not fully conscious, which should be reflected in his dialogue.

JG: Hwah? Who--howju--wha' happen?

HM: Fate happened, Jay Garrick. You have been blessed with a most sacred task.


3. Cut up to HERMES as he launches into his explanation. Behind him, we see visions of a massive battle pouring through the streets of a city. There are humans and monsters fighting it out, on land and in the air. A great fire rages behind them.

HM: A war is to come--a terrible crisis that will shake the very foundations of existence. Force unlike any you may comprehend are being assembled, and Earth's forces are not ready for them. But there are forces that would combat the rising evil, and I bring their tidings. We are searching for new champions, heroes liken to those of yesteryear, and I choose you as my champion.

JG (off-panel): Wh--champion?


4. Cut back to JAY, whose eyes fall to the ground. HERMES kneels down to his level.

JG: Not a--I'm no champion.

HM: Not now, of course. You will need strength--MY strength--to be the hero you can be.


5. HERMES raises his staff to JAY'S head, who struggles to look at it. The caduceus glows with a golden light again.

HM: Accept my gift to you, Jay Garrick--my speed, the speed of a god.


6. A thunderbolt races through JAY as his body glows with the same intensity as HERMES. His mouth is open in shock, but not a word comes out--only crackling energy (Kirby krackle?).

7. HERMES pulls the staff away, and JAY passes out again. The glow on him fades away, but he appears fine.

HM: It is done. When you awake next, you will have abilities like no other man.


8. The image of HERMES fades into a blur as we see his light retreat out of the room. His text could be reflected to show that, growing smaller with each word or letter.

HM: I pray that you use it well...


9. Finally, JAY is alone in the lab again. Both HERMES and the smoke are gone, leaving only the passed out student and the broken window.
© Copyright 2014 Kirby Ray (dominimon777 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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