Drastic Measures

We were drowning in a sea of debt. Bills piled up and lawyers sent messages. Arguments started becoming frequent as our nerves were worn. It was a downward spiral leading to a broken home. Our daughter, Cindy, was embarrassed by the arguments and often went to her room crying.

Tim and I both worked low paying jobs. I guess we could blame our troubles on that. We could. That would be the easy way. Blame the jobs and continue down the same path. Instead we decided to use common sense, evaluate the problem and consider the ways our parents and grandparents lived. Seek out possible answers and see if we could live a better life.

We both drove cars which had bad gas mileage. His 4X4 and my Camaro. Cindy's baby sitter ate up most of my wages. Two loans were for things we really didn't need. Just wanted. Piles of unused toys, clothing, nick knacks and junk that was neat to have yet totally useless showed a lot of financial waste.

Our problem wasn't our wages. Our problem was trying to have what everyone else had. To keep up with the Jones'. Pride, greed and vanity.

The first thing we did was to sell everything we didn't need. Through yard sales, flea markets, Facebook and an auction we made quite a bit of money. It paid one loan and most of another. This gave me a good reason to clean our now modestly furnished home. The home we faced losing was now nice to look at. Not the old embarrassment.

Tim did his part and sold the 4X4. I gave him my Camaro. We used the money from his truck to buy a cheap car which was fuel efficient. Yes, it hurt to get rid of the Camaro and drive a Taurus but Tim had to swallow his pride and drive a Camaro that was decked out rather girly.

We cut costs on everything we could. We refinanced the house for his wages. Not ours. The loan was longer but we didn't care. We were living realty and not some fantasy wanna-be rich life. Within a year we were able to pay off the last loan and put a few dollars in savings. Our daughter turned six and we were able to buy her presents. Buy them. Not charge them.

Soon we decided I should quit my job and become a full time wife and mother. We would save more without baby sitting costs and I could dedicate my life to what my mother and grandmother did. I enjoyed a clean house and having the spark come back into our marriage.

It was then that we talked about our lifestyle. I had felt sorry for TIm. He worked hard and wasn't even respected as the head of his household. My feminist mindset had destroyed our conservative views. It belittled him and I was too blind to see it. We decided that he was the head of the household and had all final say. It was his place to support, guide and discipline his family as our fathers and grandfathers had done.

As we held our family meetings we got Cindy involved. We changed her television and computer rules to cut down the electric bill. I stopped watching television and playing on the computer as much as well. I was starting to feel guilty. Tim worked eight to ten hours a day. The least I could do is spend the same amount of time cleaning.

In due time we had eased into a new style of life. Cindy was each family meeting soon other issues were addressed. We had come out of debt and were far happier as a family. I brought up some old time family issues Tim was hesitant about. Things which made me swallow my pride and bury my feminist ideas. Things which would bring us back to where we would have a family like our parents and grandparents.

I brought up clothing, daily tasks and discipline. Since Tim was the head of the household I figured it would be better for me to bring forth my ideas so he wouldn't be blamed by others who found out as being chauvinist. It's easy for women to belittle or feminize men but they get offended quick when traditional values are mentioned such as a man disciplining his wife.

We agreed that we had too much clothing and our reasons for having such were wrong. I had far more than he. Tim liked seeing me wear stuff that would "show off" his wife but it no longer applied to our life. I am his. For his eyes. Not others.

We decided that I should sell the designer clothes and accessories. We replaced them with seven summer and seven winter outfits. These consisted of ankle length dresses for winter with ankle length dress liners and above the knee dresses for summer with slips. My designer shoes were replaced as well with cheap women's shoes.

The money from selling the designer clothing paid for the cheaper more modest clothing. I still retained two nice dresses for church. Modest ones. Not those which I now thought looked like something a tramp would wear. Tim reluctantly agreed it would be easier to spank me by raising my skirt than dropping my pants. Cindy was informed that she too would only be in dresses from now on.

We decided my daily tasks would be the same. Now I would take Cindy to school and pick her up. I would get up and make breakfast for Tim and Cindy. Once Tim had left for work I would get Cindy ready and off to school. I would also pick her up. In between those times daily laundry would be done. Since Tim worked from seven to three-thirty I would clean as well. When he worked at home I would too. Hour for hour. I did have it easier though since I could talk to the neighbors if they came by. But I might not we have a no excuse and zero tolerance discipline policy. Unexpected chores and visits are no excuse.

We decided Tim would list daily chores on my laptop. He would also place any extra or unexpected chore on it as well. He listed the amount of time for each task so there would be no excuses for not having my work done. While this may seem degrading it was better than working for an employer for next to nothing at their pace and coming home too tired to enjoy what little money I had made.

Tim also made a list of rules and what the punishment would be for infractions. How many spanks I would receive for each. They would be modified as he found out what really worked. Cindy was informed that she was subject to both mommy and daddy's discipline. Mommy would handle problems but if mommy failed both mommy and Cindy would get a spanking. At my request Tim made a paddle to hang in every room as a reminder of where we stood in the home and under who's authority we fell. This isn't perverted entertainment but old fashioned values of household order and discipline.

Some may get upset and say this is male chauvinistic but let me share the freedom we found. I no longer have to deal with any bill collectors. I merely pass them off to my husband. I no longer slave for an employer and receive little to nothing in return. Family arguments are a thing of the past and we live within our monetary boundaries.
This all started ten years ago. Cindy is fifteen and in high school. I am thirty one and find that life is better than ever. Tim never abuses his authority and never threatens me. We have a terrific family life.

Our lifestyle is no secret to family and friends. It was embarrassing at first when I had to explain why we had a paddle hanging on the wall of every room. Some people scoffed but some did see the benefits. They also took note that we have a clean home and our bills are paid. My husband is the head of the household and I am second under him. Life is good.