Thinking about my past
relationships was a nightmare and I feel like I don't want to have
another relationship the last one was 2017, my heart was in pain, I
hate the feeling of being dumped.
That is always my role;
used, abused and a lot more and If I am going to write down it will
cover up of what I feel about myself. People say I am easy to
be with;lovable and sweet. They say I am but to the men who has been
a part of my life didn't noticed those qualities at all instead they
dumped me.
I have wanted to have someone in my life but I
guess, "I AM NOT THAT LUCKY" having a relationship right
now will just be in mind.
The truth is I AM SCARED TO DEATH to
have a partner. All the fears and doubts will flash into my mind.
(Weird but it is true)it is like if I go back to have a relationship
it is going to be horror and it will haunt me.
I feel soo
worthless right now at this very moment (this may sound like an echo)
but I am really really sad. Can't describe.
Well, I
guess I have to tell myself to face the horror, I hope I can.
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