I'm on Fire

This is a parody version of the Bruce Springsteen song as requested by my fans at r/ibs

I sit here on the porc'lin throne
Crying, and sweating, and feeling all alone
The situation's dire

Oh no no
I'm on fire

Tell me now, doctor, what am I to do?
Can't you find a cure like you're supposed to do?
Can't you see that's my one desire?

Oh no no
I'm on fire

Sometimes it's like someone took a knife
doctor, so sharp and hot
And cut a six-inch valley through the
middle of my gut

At night I wake up with the sheets soaked with sweat
And a rumbling in my gut makes me wish I's dead
This situation's still so dire

Oh no no
I'm on fire
Oh no no
I'm on fire
Oh no no
I'm on fire