Repetition

Lost in an endless repetition of actions performed with an almost hateful longing for something more. I sit in the corner of my room drowning myself in my own thoughts as well as further polluting my mind with chemicals meant to induce a state of numbness. As I numb my mind to any external factors once again I am reminded by a distant hum outside my window of times more enjoyed and the feelings associated with them. A world seemingly impossible to even exist teeming with possibility and excitement for the future. Where do these people we used to be go, when do they return and can we ever replicate them? Why do we run away from the lives that give us the most meaning? These questions give me hope to return to the person I always wanted to be apart from. I miss that person as once again I numb my mind and return to the piece of film I was watching before I wished for something more.