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We three🗝 |
| My shadow, my echo, and me. |
| The sea rages angry waves that crash upon broken bones The shore is littered with cold bodies, cast down by stones Their life blood is pulled into the sea by the waves Swirling patterns in the water; foaming anger, it rages Running across the sand, I come upon this place It seems the winds can't reach me and the ocean can't give chase Huddled in the corner, looking up into the sky Darkness pours over the land, and I hear the whole world cry, "What is this that cometh claiming lives along it's path?" But before I can answer I become a victim of it's wrath Seething flames engulf me and I burn away to ash The waves grow bigger stronger and my remains they thrash Scattered throughout the water I'm part of an endless course Life and death together they stand as a powerful and deadly force. |
| The last ember of the fire is dying and I can't seem to embrace the darkness that is to come. I stare into the warm glow and bathe my soul in the dying heat of your passion. As it slowly turns into a cinder, I try to scoop up the ashes and remold it into the love that once was ours. But as soon as my hands touch them, they dissipate into the ground and are buried along with my hopes. The crystal bubble surrounding me shatters and I am left vulnerable to the evil in my mind. I realize my protection is gone and visions of you swirl about my head taunting me; reminding me that the last flame of our happiness had died. I am left to sit alone in the shadows with lurking monsters of my mind invading my privacy.They chill me with their every touch, every remembrance of you. As I'm slowly frozen from the inside-out, my stomach churns with disbelief and I want to spew forth every last memory of us so that I can die with indifference instead of pain. The dark stillness enveloping me doesn't compare with the raging blizzard numbing every last sense inside me until I am left as a lifeless ice crystal; quickly melting away and left as a pool of despair and broken fragments of memories of what once was. |
| Here I am Safe in bed Snuggled up in blankets That cover my head No one can reach me here I'm beyond the reach of others I no longer exist in this world I've become part of another So warm inside this sanctuary I wish to stay forever But the demons will be coming to find me soon Their relentless searching spells out my impending doom. |
| Death hides around every corner Silently awaiting it's victim Thriving from dominions of darkness For those who enjoy self-affliction I've traveled with the blackness before I've never seen such sadness before It surrounds you, invades you Persuades you, degrades you Corrupts you, deconstructs you Slowly breaks you, overtakes you Down into the pit of hell. |
| From 1998/1999 Demons inside my soul are feeding off of hate Thriving off of fear they wreak havoc in my mind Strange thoughts are running through my head Dead bodies strewn around the visions I have My eyes go out of focus and my sight is warped Screaming out but no one hears anything at all My voice has disappeared with all my other senses Numbness invades my cold and blackened heart Clouds roll in and cover the land with darkness Rain pours down and erodes the ground on which I walk The volcano explodes and hot lava burns everything Destroying all in its path, hardening the ground as it mixes with the rain A collaboration with nature where unpredictability reigns The icy claws enclose my throat and begin constricting Life drains out, death pours in, and peace is finally aroused. |
| Does anyone else have visions of themselves Slicing themselves across the neck Cutting deep across the jugular and into The carotid artery where the walls are thick And you have to push hard and saw deep To get through the tissue and make sure The cut is final. The death will be real. It will all be over and you will not feel anything ever again. And does it even matter When no one counts on you for anything? When you don't serve a purpose in this life You contribute nothing to the world that makes a difference or seems to fill any important need For another human or for society, for the world. Your life is insignificant. And you are indebted So why even bother trying to make something of yourself when you've already had everything taken away from you If I had bullets and a gun, I would have shot myself in the head already by now Because it would be so easy to just pull the trigger and end it all in one determined flash. |
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