I deserve better than this

A short description of what depression can do to a person/my own experiences

Storm clouds gather
Inside my soul
Gathering in intensity as they roll

It is a battle I will face alone
As I have done many times before
It does not matter how many people you have saying they love you, support you, are there for you
In truth it is your fight to bear

I will not return to the depths of that dark and bottomless pit
I promised myself never again
The rungs are too slippery, to difficult to climb
And the more of them there are the more desperate you become

The clocks slow down, the days and nights endless, dragging
One day is exactly like the one before
No light appears to save you

The slog is endless, exhausting, brutal,
Only I can truly know what this is like
It lives and breathes inside me
Like a dark shadow, lurking, waiting.
Sucking the life from my soul little by little

I pray to sleep and never wake
I pray to a God I do not believe in, so desperate I can become.
But sleep will not come, the shadow inside won’t allow it
It screams inside my head

But rise I will
As I have done many times before
The shadow is not as strong as it once was
I am fighting for me, for my worth, for my life
And the shadow will retreat
I will beat it back time and again
I deserve better than this.