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by Patch Author IconMail Icon
Rated: GC · Column · Comedy · #692537
A modern look at the evolution of the car horn
What was the original purpose of the car horn? can anyone remember? I'm sure it had a purpose other than just making noise. Whatever the purpose, its fallen through the proverbial crack, now the car horn is a weapon, meant to enrage or warn off others. I've heard it many times, usually accompanied with yelling and screaming or some derogitory hand signal. I find it rather amusing that the second a driver is infuriated he slams his hand in the center of a steering wheel, even when the horn is a button conveniently located on the dash or steering coloum, old habits die hard.
The horn itself has changed to suit the driver, once simplicit, the horn now evolves to suit the type of car it inhabits, as everyone is aware of the annoying 'beep beep' made by little cars, such as barinas, so I wont go into detail. The driver now also has the opportunity to modify the horn, many young hoons, you will find, enjoy the musical horn, mainly for its novelty and its stupidity. A friend of mine even went to the extreme of having a police siren installed in his car, although somewhat illegal, it did cut peak hour in half. Air horns are also rather popular, if you can't make anyone understand you, at least you can send them deaf trying, but I'd draw the line at six per car people, noise polution is a crime, and the representitives of the law will fine you for it. Given time, I'm sure the horn will be replaced with a push button vocal insult, such as "hurry the fuck up" "the lights are fucking green" "move it dickhead" and "oh for fucks sake".
I myself am looking forward to the day when, small cars abandon their 'dof dof' music and adopt air horns,that would be most amusing to watch.; I often walk past an old car yard and occasionally I can hear the horns cry out for their old owners, who abandoned them so thoughtlessly, you can feel their pain and you know their fate, but believe me, they love their owners. When a car spins out of control, the driver falls on the wheel dead, the horn knows, it cries out at the death of its master, its cries are painful, but the horn always knows, and the horn will keep crying until it is dead too.
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