The Adventures of the Sexy Gnome

Bob Gets Sexy!


Some would say Bob was a regular gnome. Even Bob himself thought no different. But things all changed in a seemingly normal day in the Hood.

Bob stretched out in his owner's grass, patiently waiting for Pepito, the frog dealer, to come by his house. His legs were kind of cool this morning, but he took no notice and continued admiring the wonderful flamingo named Lorraine in the next yard. She looked at him for a moment, before screeching and turning away. Bob was momentarily confused. He thought he took a shower in the sprinkler today, so it wasn't the smell...

He looked down, and to his horror, his pants were no longer on him. He jumped up quickly, searching for his pants in the near areas around his house. He ran quickly to the fountain, staring at his reflection in the water.

He was completely naked.

He gasped and screamed loud enough for the next yard to hear. He looked down at his now naked torso, and a realization dawned on him.

God, I'm sexy!

The embarassed face quickly turned into a broad smile, and he strutted back to his yard. The other gnomes were avidly staring, and finally Tiki-Tiki walked over to Bob.

"Bob, what be happenin' to you dis mornin'?" Tiki-Tiki said with an astonished look on his face. Bob grinned wider.

"Tiki-Tiki, someone took my clothes. And don't I look good!" Bob strutted around Tiki-Tiki, admiring himself with no shame.

"Dis be the sign from the Devil! Bob, you must be goin' to pray!" Tiki-Tiki was horrified, but Bob payed no notice. Pepito came into view, running along with frogs dangling from his belt.

"Eh, Bob, why ain't you got clothes on, homes? That's like a federal offense or something, man." Pepito gave Bob an observing look, stopping dead at his stomach.

"Go on, Pepito, you can look," Bob said seductively, before giving Pepito a very unbashful wink. Pepito made a gagging sound, dropping all of the frogs to the ground. All of the neighbors who did frogs had their mouth hanging open.

All hell broke loose in the Hood.

Half of the gnomes dived towards the loose frogs, picking them up with greedy, chubby fingers. The frogs were thought of like human cocaine; the acid the frogs emit get gnomes high just like any other drug. So at the scene of free frog acid laying on the ground, the druggie gnomes had a complete breakdown.

Bob was in complete ecstacy. With all of the commotion from the frogs laying on the groud, no one seemed to notice that Bob was naked. Other gnomes kept running into his completely uncovered skin, and Bob felt himself smile. He liked being naked, and no one would change that for him.

Until he talked to Lorraine.

End of Chapter One