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10k views, 2x BestPoetryCollection. A nothing from nowhere cast words to a world wide wind |
I had a lover's quarrel with the world - Robert Frost | I'm sorry you got caught in the middle. - me This poet’s words collect, arrange on a kaleidoscope spectrum. The experience of discovery through writing is the truest reward that has allowed me to grow and learn who/what I am — what other people get naturally, immediately, while I stomp around in it. Been blessed, but pushing it — envelope, world and all inhabitants away. Push buttons, find boundaries to trip traps. No clue why cat curiosity, living in your dark. (Bored, perhaps?) Now and then, push dirt out of this hole; someone/thing/entity might envision me how I need to be viewed (if I knew what that was). Cryptic, yes. Try living in my dark, find comfort amid strange, virtual, wonderful walls that tower above, tempt me to scale. Been more than I could imagine or expect here. But, achievements aren’t going on a LinkedIn wall ![]() No prize to eye; not incentivized. Dealt the worst two cards before the flop, do best with what’s in hand. My Pluggers: You are an icon here. ![]() You suffer, but you suffer brilliantly. Wow, what a great writer. ![]() It’s like plugging myself, but using other people’s (reviewers) words…Review of "Poetic Referendum(s) On Life" ![]() Your poetic muse is on fire! ![]() ![]() Published four times with one a literary journal, including… ![]() ![]() I don’t submit because it’s too much work. Truly alone, know no one cares to show they believe/support me. Lip service feeds delusion. I’ve seen a lot of smoldering and snow. Try not be cynical, work hard at openness and consideration — work, sooo…gut thing. August 28, 2006 this blog opened ▼
No specific aim going forward (2014) ▼ ![]() ![]() ![]() What? Oh, this? A rhetorical, self-motivational speech I'm working on. Don't just read the parts to construct your theory, as if to confirm (construed out of context) your opinion, mentally-stunted Neanderthal. Therapist wants me to be less negative toward myself. I see it as attacking, rather than being defensive. Fear I will chomp too many bullets unintentionally sent toward the unsuspecting. If you can be triggered for stupid reasons, then I? …just looked like me rolling around on the floor with myself. ![]() What Was NEW Who am I, you ask? My mirror knows that question, repeated daily. Just trying to create a little buzz, not boost my ego. ![]() ![]() #amwriting #poetry #blog #contest #freeverse #award #bestpoetry #freyaridings #lyrics #music #video #YouTube Can you believe it took this long for someone to put a quarter in me and push the button GET ANGRY? Mud 4 My Eye: ![]() |
Chance favored me without preparation. Trailed hazardous life stumbling over serendipity near the turbulent waters lapping my ignorant shores ready to consume a fool. What were my odds? the chance I'd survive ordinary existence to reach its inevitable end with fortuity? Manifest destiny or fate life seemed to be lived by accident. Found love. Periled lips still savor kismet. Was it providence, coincidence, happenstance? or did I just get away with cheating life because of dumb luck? 12.24.22 20 lines free verse "Invalid Post" ![]() 12.5.22 PPC Prompt: Luck "Invalid Post" ![]() Kerf form |
thank you for unnecessary commentary in this shared theatre I shouldn't push play why don't I learn? is a poet supposed to get to the point? thank you for the unprovoked remarks in the din I live in Should've worn my headphones Why don't I insulate? is a poet supposed to self-edit? for you? you've been kind to give your opinion in my shrinking domain, a condition where little space can be sought to self-isolate Where is the acceptance I yearn? Is a soul supposed to dry its pen? What am I living in that walls don't echo my thoughts? The vibrant messages could soothe aching ears Where am I living if I cannot go from here without you on my mind vigorously absorbing all of my soul's light? thank you for choosing me to hear you out A chamber envelops my lungs, heart pushed to the glass How can I unpin and ask for my breath back? Let a poet grip foolishly again his words flung to a non-dimensional wall expanding to infinity and all I’ll not capture thank you. 12.23.22 12.26.22 added 3 end lines 4.9.23 added punctuation, more capitalization and last line. it's about sharing music i love in shared amphitheater, and have to hear her say she doesn't like this song or that artist, or thinks the volume too loud or when will it end? things like these attach to my heart, she severs with her blunt knives |
your mother had to knit you cool blue mittens to hold my red hot heart when we enmeshed in snow melted and froze into ice spring did not thaw you i was a puddle cars drove through sent skyward blocked promise land above heartless sun a heavy rising you were saved by my freezer i can still open the door gaze in that dark refrigerator and wonder how long you'll stay in tact if i could hold you one more time my mother didn't knit mittens for that 12.20.22 18 lines |
We would really like to know If ever I'm perfect they'll dismantle me maybe, study me but mostly, do away with me We lost paradise once Tirelessly, must settle for imperfection? I hand her the correct change she says perfect I complete their application submit, he looks it over perfect Making an appointment I respond to need of contact info Verbal utterance echoes on the line perfect You can't call me back Unable to process my application I passed counterfeit bills (coins I can't mint) You don't know me I could be the person trying to undo all that is perfect, "functional" within the frequencies, communes of coexistence, governed society, aiming with just one word — perfect Perfect? Do you hear yourself? What's perfect about correct address? You've never been here I could live in squalor police sirens blaring, cars jacked — a militarized zone, mortar shells perfect bullets rip past down my street as I take the car out again and it performs as it should on journey to my next 'perfect' when I stop (while it rolls independently) to consider, then pat the fading dash from my leather-creased, captain's chair inside a rusty hull, bumper cracked radio-sometimes-working, beaut of a machine and say 'you're what's perfect'... even though, you aren't. If I don't appreciate all imperfection and what functions, necessitating a weary life keeping me going up this hill we're on before the six foot drop off or crusher, then I must admit between here and where eternity ends I might make it to perfect... Envisioning a white cloud airily lifting me close enough to touch bluest heaven and no one will see I'd keep it to myself between me and the Chevy We'll both drive off that cliff before we'll let anyone dissect us. We are what we are and it ain't perfect Okay, good, thank you, I have all that I need... unless there's something more? 12.16.22 62 lines (free verse} Best Long poem I've written in sometime, if ever. a little, annoying word on the lips of many little minds, more functional than me. and you know what else I don't care for? indifference. |
don't want to be too sing-songy avoid the stunted syllables grinding out each unsubmitted manuscript that light these pages unseen by the main don't want to be alone pitchy singing avoid the top of stunted chords grinding melody each retracted utterance could light still hearts unheard by that main untested but willing singing in rain showers puddle splashing, hopping over hearts inside windows in my yellows like spring sop-wet with the sky's tears for a little man inside unloved by her who'll not be if I don't get outside a foggy dream get seen, heard and loved. 12.11.22 |
![]() the flaw in our beauty a broken heart holds together in its sand, its ancestor until that final heap topples a fractured vessel, ice glass bleeding. tides try claim the mess, wash remains to sea. some pieces hunker in grit, hold on, wear down. you don't see, unobserved from dark space separating a billion miles a second, speeding away away away, down to bottom of this shared ocean, middle of our galaxy. you didn't glimpse while your heart was cracking, too. but I noticed, and noticed you didn't see me. we share sand – blown, mysterious, special fish bowl or flower vase people, each of us fragile. not adjoining on shelf, we'll not ocean together at the same time, aweigh on this life forever and ever and ever. don't say amen. i already hate me for being impure. 12.5.22 12.7.22 some major edits could suffice as lyrics; what chorus? written to: men have feelings we're taught to access the part of our flawed DNA that doesn't allow us to show it, or feel shame if we do slightly altered version ▼ |
Decades long I still cannot metabolize you (It’s been) a lingering death Memory is still here (falsely) disguised Nostalgia lingers in shadows Dementia swallows regurgitates in dreams (Your face) the same in hollows (which eludes) my enzymes consuming (my love) of any other Period… The approximation of exclamation since I couldn’t form the proper interrogation to get to the end of our story… Antacids aid in this digestion 12/3/22 Could title (Read Between The Lines) but that’s not the point. You could say I’m weird again…but on closer inspection… Maybe they should Quill ‘Poet Of The Year’ I would concisely conceal that tattoo somewhere on my body before doctors sever the afflicted appendage. Simply: I’ve not been worthy of it, if not her Travel back in time with me to win Her love? When we know Who she is?? (What do you suppose antacids could be?) 🥃🥃🥃🥃🥃 |
Subtitle: I know why you’re alone, Brenna Untested Conversation It’s familiarity familial people they see daily talk to but not me who sits in the corner as would a lonely puppy trying not give that impression avoiding pity inside the distance can be - engaging enlightening frightening sees what conversation you prefer rather not intervene send to a rocky ledge but would embrace you against my field of abyss - hold against this untested world - kept from your known safety from my discourse sees eyes avert empathizes with that discomfort fragile soul fleet animal must forest within denizen’s kin spares the approach from a cur at your tables spared from an observer who knows fear and loneliness and true survival as one against the void in a din incipient space fissured wide open closed by a constant, linear soul 12.2.22 It’s not poetry you fear, but what weight words. R-E-L-A-X But, in other words: I get it. I can be too much. A growing affliction with some unknown/undiagnosed social condition:disorder since I was 7, walking down a road in my pajamas because I thought my mom abandoned me in another state. …now Brenna. A work friend of my wife (statement in 'work friend') who is 32, attractive, opines about not getting married, but will have a baby with or without a husband (and the three bedroom home), operates safely in her domain, her confines. I see, like me, she won't get out of her comfort zone because the unknown isn't easy to approach, as with that sound in the night behind the door in that horror movie called life. Brenna, poor, poor, girl. *sigh* I am safety? I have to wonder. Now…this pompous announcement…
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They floated me out on dinghy upon a tumultuous tide rode soft, swift, deft atop highest wave to the swell sucking sweetly down I wanted to fly looking on blue sky Why a watery surface with its unknown depth? They sang to me from shore too gently Bird and bee dimensionally sung It hurt. Skirts flirt motion from an ocean for a willing, wanton clown Will it come back around? I needed oars to row envisioning sought, brilliant horizon Why does it escape day to day unable to paddle back time? No chorus, nor melody now for an ostentatious fool in his common vessel. 12.2.22 It needs work, but I’ll brave eyes upon it. |
Reflecting Mortality a thin vision near Drawn down while you’re stuck chasm I can’t cross no magic in imagination to build a bridge see you gaze at my emerald as I peer down on your ruby you fierce clutch your animal I built these ethereal castles that topple from stones I see you place your beast aside by the river gleaming flowing smoothing a bed where you could punch through a surface to clutch its offering when my clouds appear a portal takes me back away before you can take me down into that unknown 11.25.22 |
Each time I open the pantry door now to deposit them in the brown paper bag held inside the receptacle, I scoff “say hello to the Pacific Ocean for me.” There’s major breakthroughs in the field of bullshit while we believe we save a periled planet one recycled Pepsi 20-ounce bottle at a time. Cut apart those six plastic rings…for Flipper. Bottle-nosed. 11.21.22 |
Little Gourd I witnessed the plumpest gourd blossom on its vine -- yellow, flower-topped, sere soul embedded beneath backyard pine. It didn’t need much sunshine. Withered, bloom tapered brown, it dropped after sundown, when ripening stopped. Not cold, inert, slow shriveling during our dry days. Dark veggie inspired so much hope in those rays. Lone, bright bell, detached, hard-melded a be-pricked surface. Silent glossed by eventual frost, my heart sank somewhere around midnight. It wasn't better in sunlight. Fewer gourds appear each year, for an ignorant farmer who still cannot conceive how he erred. How much more could I have cared? Not much I can do. Till, fertilize, close the bed until spring. Plant again. How long am I to toil before hope runs out for a little gourd to feed from that stem? 11.24.22 Reap what you sow My toil with words bears hopeful fruit appreciating with time. It's really about raising my kids.
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buds of chrysanthemum the mums went silent in their pots on the porch step since frost since snow fell over night white woven with green, chin hairs pierce a soft blanket yielding, receding past a naked maple clinging to precarious, withered offspring, iced yellow-peaked porch blooms poke, penetrate our early shadows they’ll not die easy brave buds of chrysanthemum, bright, beautiful, crisp as new winter weather greet me 11.18.22 just looking out my window at something that I could take care of |
A GROUNDBREAKING ADVANCEMENT IN THE FIELD OF OBSOLESCENCE Me Every damn day Then, mothballs Unzip Return heroically, again Get stapled to wall Work all day to free myself relentlessly Fly into the ceiling fan fall pick myself up Say, 'Aha! You didn't foil me that time.' Look at watch and yawn Back to the mothball haven 10 hours later pour two black cups sweeten, add cream chug chug chug off i go on adventure splat! This’ll take a little longer So on and so forth It goes like that i marvel at life what it throws at me Doesn't know i return every damn day pelted by rain stung by sleet fluffed by flakes frozen in gales zip up tighter trudge move my iron shovel move a mountain move a heavy frame enter the inner portal warm, again sing in steam shower dry binge forgotten television stop wondering about existentialism for a few hours Fatalistic? Bed try to sleep write write write stuff like this until my eyes... should i? no sleep wake Some days, remind we forget the mothballs still bound about a planet aim for sky trip, fall pick ourselves up don't care if anyone sees but try something less dangerous crossword spend day in bed back in head write again dream write more fantasize write into a corner something too long for any printed publication outmoded in 15 minutes time delusion? no, pretty sure it's not Incredible i can do all this and have time for more in(s)anity Don't see very well — judgment shaming shunning or is it paranoia? nope just indifference maybe, gaslighting i can accept i'm average keep leaping over higher and higher mounts pull tall ships from harbor to sea chug chug chug-a-lug-gug-gug write write write mothballs zip sleep...perchance... coda ~ you think you can manipulate and control me, life? watch what i do duck and slide move to side Throw your worst at me don't care if I live or die i'm as valueless at birth as i will be below the womb in dirt Be careful of my loved ones they profit from my demise more space in the mothball tent less of my words to eat. 11.4.22 Hello, non-existant publisher? Oh, yeah. It's just a lighted wall with very low wattage. Plug me in?? I only mean this in the most expressive of senses. I don't live with disregard but respect. In defense of the death benefit portion of policy. |
I don’t know if this speaks what I mean… This is what it’s like to be at the bottom of a jar. You can manage to climb topside but you’ll never get the lid off. Potential as a positive possession that cannot escape from its realm, or actually exceed. Did I climb in? Yes. Did I know what I was getting into? No. It looked cozy inside the glass house. Growing paranoia? No. Because it makes you too numb to do anything about it, or care. I fear I’ll strike a sharp instrument one day that will free me from this gas. Then what will you do? Try not to cut myself on the shards. I likely won’t escape, but wait for another jar? Why? What else is there? My mind is too drained to conceive. The gas inside my glass is thick. In evaporation, I get glimpses. It’s too strange to think what might have been. Shelved. …but I’m trapped. 10.30.22 Thanks to all the people who’ve said ‘wait right there’ and never returned. I either don’t approach anymore, or walk away once I lose sight of them. |
She wiped a silver spatula clean of buttercream on black napkins after each incision of a red wedding cake three tiers, four corners — what were my chances of getting a corner piece? i trod, clomped, lumbered a lazy line in slow tow She cut each precisely, plated the pampered squares One corner left One small boy before me He got the desired lot without a smile for her delivery I grabbed four used napkins savored cravenly on exit her puzzled expression. 10.30.22 |
Unmasked Crusader Whose Name I Forget Did somebody kill your parents, too? Maybe, you want to get that knee off my neck, Batman? Who’s the black one here? Since I’ve known you, your molars grind like a knife carving rock. Some mistake your need for justice with desire for rightful vengeance. Do you know with who you’re fighting? Green graspers see your carnal desire. Profile, fund malice, step away but don't watch. Here on the cement lasting nine minutes. A weaponized human of hate against society, veils as your killer... clueless, unable to think for self, for community. Incentivized, implied infer what to do, ego emboldened. Hatred, the gleaming fire, brands. They glad pat your back in shadow, toss another biscuit, ring a Pavlovian bell. Puts me on flat, hot cement. Can’t compose thoughts to reason with you... until they speak for me too late. Not a room full of writers flashing scripts, or most uncommon composure to express. A watch smashed into irreversible time. You have your whole life. I couldn’t count to ten. Everything is hindsight, reaction in retrospect. Proactive? We don’t get do overs, only fantasize what is right and what is wrong. I watch this heavy scale now compress a planet. We embellish, don’t we dark crusader? Another crusade gets rerouted from a parade path to monuments of justice. Buried black box, you in cinder cubicle, soon rubble, forgotten. And, now what do you fight? A system that builds monsters, molded from bullies sent to their gray rooms with no dessert for an oops, my bad? 10.28.22 11.1.22 Just re-edited and added to this. It got away from me and became a George Floyd thing. I can relate to injustice and people in shadows pulling strings to get others to act on their behalf for what they call the greater good...all systemic. For not being a pawn, I have to get out of the way now and watch it go down with all the people I love, or could love, if we'd be allowed to unite in peaceful harmony. As best I can put it, for now. Can I just say you can get profiled for something other than skin color, sexuality but other unwanted preferences interfering with their society? In fact, be the least patronized now, stock plummeting. Not that I care. It's affecting my offspring. No?? |
When You Woke What’s the point of listening to the whole album? But we’ve done it -- body gravity-laid, stereo on dresser, juddered 50-lb speakers undulating, or ears sponge-cupped to coiled cord strung tight across a cabled room. Three tiny bones accept waves entering a narrow passageway, swim a vibrating canal to drum, undeniable musical messages. From one side, flipped and then the other. Repeated. Why take time to consider every lyric, every melting melody on our backs, in recompose? Empty minds immersed an hour of scarred vinyl, diamond pointer plying wave-grooves gliding a lumpy platter perfect-playing anthems. Delicious sounds paired with new ideas, arriving thoughts. We compose, carry forward processed lives pre-recorded, in old denim profess — called boomers. Sounding clear as minted silver in lead, quarter clangs, circles a cylindrical container, bounced by youth with no skill for a beer-bath receptacle? Take a drink runt. Your memes and 15-second mind candy will rot your head, kid. You’re the record they mint now. You’ve been flipped. I’ll be on the dark side of the moon when you woke. 37 lines of free verse 10.28.22 10.29.22 edit, public 11.8.22 edit for proper context and metaphor(s) on message ▼ |
Binge After The Holographic Time Warp We’ve been racing our vehicles hard back-and-forth through time flowing through intersections missing off-ramps speeding past posted police. We worry about being pulled over. But, the sun starts to rise and a road ahead gleams brilliant. We go faster the better. And, on these journeys employ navigational gear rewritten map heads. Familiar road signs seen stops along the way nostalgic places consume, refuel. Places we dream never match expectation. Sweet memory she couldn’t leave a sawmill town now shut down. No logs jam a river. Brakes unemployed roll past a ghost town not torn down but heart drawn shapes by exes and ohs eat through thinning paper. Can I still come to your house? echoes over wire black strung overhead. Loop through past farm fields if not inserted strip malls, gas stations or pearly banks. So many degrading institutions. Your heap groans into bends of roundabouts merging with semis taking two lanes. If you double back through that slip-second portal wormhole to present pull into that holographic hole throw off coat skin wash hands ignore potatoes growing tubers in a pantry void (experimental, hypothetical not dead yet, but not alive) that could peel you order out tonight again binge. Pictures so clear cannot be traded for fuzzy, particled reception on the dumpster-tossed once road-ready 7” television glowing connected to a 9-volt lighter outside a cab underneath that canopy of starlit leaves with dissatisfaction. Hi-Def lies the truth about our memories. 10.28.22 I don’t care if it strays from metaphors or fails to illume imagination from inside a bubble-wrapped head. |
Woozy with drug, floating in a rusted out tub I don’t seem to drown The water goes down a ring around my neck marks time wasted in my fiberglass palace much water displaced Over time, skin dries just like gill-slit eyes marking murky time in these temporary baths Pass me another glass More burgundy to pass 10.28.22 It sounds like you don’t enjoy life, Brian. It is what it is, for the present time. High tide nears…I’ll ride those waves until done. Whee |