This is a much better poem than mine as you bring feelings into this poem which mine lacks
but thank you for comparing the two poems as the thought is very similar but it ends there,
I used to call that being lazy, but depression is no joke
and I have seen people suffer from it for long periods of time
and some ended their lives. Seek help.
George
All poets face a blank canvass that must have words painted on to it and you have certainly done that well with this masterpiece of writing that can ring a bell with many readers. We sometimes need a little help which our imagination supplies us with.
Hardly a time piece you can put in your pocket, but whether it's a 100 feet tall or you can wear on your wrist the hands of time always move and no one can stop them but the day when the Lord will come again to claim us all.
Great no fault poem.
A nice piece of writing with no punches pulled as to the whys of breaking up. Just a missing piece of the puzzle that couldn't be found in a romance that has faded and no longer is fulfilling so it was time to say goodbye and part company.
Love is music when it has been put to words otherwise is is like a gong that never rings. So if you have a song in your heart and you let the world hear, then your music is pure love and will remain ever dear.
This is a poem with a message that I hope gets through to kids who think the wrong thing is the right thing in life.
Many a person who was brought up well went sour when things got tough and hung out with trouble makers.
I have seen it as I was growing up when some kids followed a life of crime only to be put away for life.
At first I was going to give this poem a 4.5 but then realized it was a love sonnet which has been done to perfection. There is nothing I can find amiss in this delightful sonnet.
Reminds me of a number of poems I wrote about my wife when we first met. You have turned in a poetic masterpiece
however I would have added the final two lines for continuity sake and it would have been perfect.
Very well written. Kept me interested all the way through and the ending was perfect. This should have been a contest winner in my humble opinion. Tense and gripping.
Ah, how typical a feeling a lot of poets get when words fail them and others seem to have no problem at all expressing themselves with words. Loved the poem for its honesty and well formed idea.
Loved the story of old times remembered and how the new has replaced them, not the same as the old. Oh well we always have memories that never grow old as long as we keep them, they'll still be fresh and new. Can't fault his poem on any count. Loved it and it brought back memories of my youth with different characters.
You write much with few words that leaves the reader to fill in how the poem affects his life and when you offer in poetry that which can effect many people you have done your job as a poet. A sun rise can be expressed in a thousand words but one word would explain it all. BEAUTIFUL
We are on the same page of letting thoughts take shape regardless of the degree of pain. Poets thrive when they can empty their heads from thoughts that always seem to bother us but once you clean them up an place them on your writing pad they lose all their sting. Great poem and I wouldn't change a thing. It is compelling in it's brevity.
Eaglewings
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