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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/alcides
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27 Public Reviews Given
28 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of Writing.Com 101  Open in new Window.
Review by Alcides Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (1.0)
Congratulations doesn't even fit in this context.

Alcides
2
2
Review of losing sight  Open in new Window.
Review by Alcides Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.0)
A very expressive poem.

Nice flow to it--all the way to your conclusion.

I know not of a word such as 'aswim,' though I gather it could've been a typo.

I believe that the edict of capitalization should be a constant in any sort of writing, though anyone can do as they please--still?

I enjoyed the feeling that the poem expresses, though.

Alcides
3
3
Review of Who Is Death  Open in new Window.
Review by Alcides Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
Your character was well developed and described throughout your poem and to the climax.

The rhyming was most excellent.

I only questioned whether you were missing a question mark after several sentences throughout your poem, particularly: 'Or does he just stay cast in a darkly, villainous part.'.

Otherwise, I enjoyed your representation of Death as you see him, the ever-present villain of life, the anti-life, the one who sulks in the dark.

I really enjoyed your poem.


Alcides
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Review by Alcides Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
I liked the pace of your poem. It was impeccable as it revealed and described the character splendidly.

It had a perfect flow all the way to the climax.

The rhyming was flawless, too, perfectly written.

It was very, very, very enjoyable.
5
5
Review by Alcides Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
I liked your introductory opening. It’s one that will surely connect with many kindred spirits.

The flow, pace, and cadence from start to finish was impeccable, as well.

I did find a spot that had me a bit confused, though. That spot was in paragraph five and line three, where I read “. . . laugh maniacal.” It didn't seem right unless you can justify that. I wondered if you rightly meant to write that in reverse with the adjective before the noun, as it should be. Aside from that, I saw nothing else.

What I did see was a very, very enjoyable short story, almost likened to a free verse poem that I enjoyed reading.

Alcides
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6
Review of MOMMY  Open in new Window.
Review by Alcides Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
I could help but like your poem. It's the kind of poem I would like to write one day for my Mom who parted several years ago.

You develop a kinship with those who have suffered a loss like you. That is what I liked best.

Yes, I most certainly enjoyed this heartfelt poem.
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Review by Alcides Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
A very interesting and in depth portfolio you have here.

I can see what you like, and I wish you good fortune.

Yes, a most enjoyable portfolio.
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8
Review by Alcides Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Excellent bit of humor, I say.

You detailed all the way down the cool punch line. Yikes!

I liked it. A nice flow throughout your narrative could be seen.

I humor story, all right, with a touch of possible reality, made enjoyable.
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9
Review by Alcides Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
A nice intro, Lisa, and a finer path to the end of your tale.

I like animal stories, excellent characters for the right stories. I've written some, as well. They are great for kids, especially if it has a moral.

Here you have a classical moral for kids, for those who seek unwise adventures without Mom's permission, and deserving a good spanking, if the scare hasn't been punishment enough.

Lis, I do believe I noticed a few punctuations missing, here and there: one prior to a conjunction and one after a preposition. Sorry, and a period that should have been a comma, I noted.

More importantly, I liked the flow of your tale
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