What an absolutely adorable poem; the rhyming just seems to skip along and your metaphors are apt, beautiful and unique. I would love to pick a favourite line or two but, frankly, it's impossible as it's too perfect a little gem to pick apart!
What a wonderful poem; funny, yes but sad. To me it's sad anyway - how many people are there out there that I am not paying attention to, too busy to realise their existence when a smile or a "hello" could make all the difference. That's the emotions it stirred in me.
In terms of grammar, style, punctuation: no suggestions for improvement!
someone, somewhere has got to maintain hope, belief, confidence in humanity, right! It is reassuring to think someone is watching although me must never lose sight that we are the masters of our own destiny.
You have some nice anlogies in your piece but the flow isn't quite there - perhaps you could do some work on this?
I quite like this although it reads a little bit like a shopping list There are some nice rhymes and it flows quite well so that's a huge plus.
You might want to consider the following:
Is there certain qualifications Qualifications is in plural, so it should be Are there certain qualifications
Also, you are asking a vast number of questions yet I see only two question marks - you might want to just add a bit more punctuation which, actually, I think will improve the flow even more.
How many sad sentiments you express - I can feel the tide of sadmess washing over me through the computer!
You might want to consider checking the Capitals on each line to ensure they are consistent (reads / looks better that way, I find) and also using some punctuation; you are asking a lot of questions but not a single question-mark in sight
I was intrigued merely by the title "If". My life has been filled with "If only this, that and the other" and other What If scenarios. The most important lesson I have learnt is, well, learning so that when you are in a similar situation (not necessarily 18 again) you are armed with a wider ammo of weapons, knowledge, perception, wisdom and insight.
Many things, I believe, we would all go back and change. But, good or bad, our past decisions are part of who and what we are today; one of life's little challenges is that we love who we are, warts and all
I loved this piece and led me down a well-trodden path of memories, dreams and desires - Thank you!
I didn't notice any grammar / typos but wasn't particularly looking as I was too busy enjoying myself
Hello Sugaree
This is a powerful poem with a strong & potent message, and one that I believe many can relate to. Unfortunately, from time to time we all find ourselves with people in our lives who are no good for us. The sooner we own up to that truth ourselves the better.
I have just one correction to suggest:
similar to a lime and it
act like you didn’t mean
and treat me like s***? The 'it' doesn't really fit in this stanza as I'm not sure what it is referring to. I suggest:
similar to a lime and act
like you didn't mean
to treat me like that.
Hi Barbara
ah yes, the harsh realities of crossing that hurdle. Still, I liked the way you handled the subject with, laced with sarcasm and the witty twist at the end.
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It's all you say, and 
- not sure that that makes it an 13+ rated item? 