Thanks for solid writing and believing the monstrous atrocities of Hitler's Third Reich. Many are tragedicly lulled forgeting how humanity is capable of destruction. The message is a spiritual force, which I deeply appreciate, works reality, though ignored by rational thinkers, mostly historians bound by historicism. Fortunately you are not, thus fantasy can close the gap between real and imagined events, however, what is often more powerful is a closer rendition of truth. Such was included in the middle of your work when visions of torture and genocide coinsided with Hitler's encounter. Subtley is advantageous and deceptively persuasive, more idea conciousness is generated in feeling and picture with less words, it separates writing from other mediums, flagellates our imagination center. I would edit to clear up some spelling and unnecessary additions. Ask what deters the force of the story, is it the description, or does the device of the cane add drama? Where will the reader get bogged down, lose interest? Keep writing, Buck
Ann, Me too. 1967, Dad drunk, gun at Mom's head, us three huddled around. She stared him down, fear became an insufficient tool to shake protective instincts.
I once had a Doctor say 'so what's so different about you?' I've thought a great deal about that not so rhetorical question.
A little wordy for me. Want more about after, will it be a great escape story? Keep writing. Buck
Thanks for Let Me, Eva. Concept is awesome, I want this under my skin but doesn't get there for me, maybe its word choice. Is 'sweater' to distant? Or maybe direction is confusing, is this feeling inside out or outside needing in?
The demand is clear in the end, i felt what you want, it works, could that begin this piece, possibly adding tension? Good work, your on to something here. Buck
Epic beginning, a little heavy on the amazing powers for me. One reference is capable of producing the desire to read on and instill the idea of events to come. Let me imagine with a big picture, can't see the world, maybe intentional? I like the seen of the god among men, name? One is not so average, thanks.
Overall, please continue, you got my hackling interest up. Buck
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