Good use of imagery and personification. I love that you are a poet who realizes that it is perfectly okay to write poetry that does not rhyme. I only gave you the 4.5 because nothing is ever perfect. These lines are, perhaps, my favorite:
First of all, I enjoyed your story. You have a good vocabulary. As a teacher, I found your story very realistic; however, it's been my experience that boys of that age will say "porn" rather than pornography. Also, your first sentence seemed a bit awkward. Otherwise, great job!
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