I had a hard time following this piece and staying attracted to the material. We don't really know who he is talking to, or what their reactions or response is. Just his over and over. The vulgar language being tossed about was also off putting. I mean a little vulgarity goes along way, but the way it was in every other line or so, cheapened the shock value of it. It was quite distracting and I couldn't follow the bit with his mom with some Doctor, his doctor? Was the point to show he had feelings for the sounds his mom makes when she is with another man? I think the piece has something for a one sided conversation, I think toning down the vulgarity of it and perhaps giving us some facial expressions from him as he talks. Is he on a phone, is he in a shrink session, show us how he feels or we have no reason to connect with him. Is he angry, sad, confused, I had no idea because the language covered all of it. He is impassioned about what he is saying, but it doesn't come across well what you want us to feel or understand about this conversation.
This was a really cool piece. I liked the last few moments of a termite's life. How brave they were until the end. It brings to mind that someday something may decide that we need to be exterminated. There was a lot of thought put into this. This is good work. Keep up the writing!
I liked your piece. It made me stop to analyze myself and decide who I am among the temperments, as well as my loved ones. I noticed you had a typo in one of the paragraphs "ingrity" should be integrity right? I hope to see more from you in the future. Take care and keep writing.
I have fiound this article to be useful and informational. As a new member, I had no idea that most of that existed. I really appreciate someone who is willing to take their time and effort to help others better understand how their statistics read. This piece is something I will reference and keep on hand for further use. (When I figure out how to add this o my favorites)
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