This is a very sweet and thoughtful story about your family during the holidays. Tradition is also very important to my family, and I'm glad to see that my family isn't the only one who has an unhealthy addiction to certain Christmas movies, although in our case we watch a Christmas Carol to the point of insanity. Nice to read a little about Christmas in July....well, June, but we're almost there. Keep up the good work!
I really enjoyed reading your poem, as I think that the topic of longing to change what has gone wrong in the past is something almost everybody can relate to. The repition of your first line in the stanzas was very effective in emphasizing the speaker's passion and emotion. Overall, a very good read especially since I am usually not one for free verse. Keep writing!
Wilma
I think that this is a very good story, and somewhat reminiscent of an Aesop's fable. I'm not sure if you were going for a political or philosophical statement here, but I found myself thinking about how this story parallelled with regimes under dictators where genocides have occured. Either way, a very good story, with a very good lesson.
Oh my gosh. This was so cleverly played out and full of wit. I loved the tongue and cheek humor and it kept me smiling the whole time through. You clearly have the makings of a comedian.
I love the similie you used comparing your thoughts to spiders. Overall very good, and I can tell that you have a real emotion connection with this poem.
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