Very very VERY good. I would give it 5 stars, but there are many grammar errors and misspellings. Also parts of it flow better than others, causing your story to speed up and slow down. But it was an amzing piece. :DDD
The beggining is weak, the middle is good, the ending is great. They're all so different in quality that it chops up your story into sections, not letting it flow. Work on the first part and make it just as emotional and evoking as the ending, and it will make this piece outstanding.
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