This one hit a little too close to home for me. Which for you as a poet is a good thing. But for me as a reader and one who recently went through a painful divorce it is painful for me to read, because it is so well-written.
Even though I am a male, I understand only too well the emotions you express in your poem. And even though I am unable to cry on the outside, I can assure that I have drowned in the tears within my heart.
One of the most powerful lines in the poem for me is the following: "She gave up, now forever she'll be, just a haunting memory". You hit the nail right on the head with that one! I even find it difficult to do things that remind me of my ex-wife, things we used to do together, because they trigger memories that at one time brought me joy, but now only give me unbearable pain.
I must confess, I am a little concerned about the last two lines in your poem. Even though it's not explicit, there is a certain hint of suicidal ideation in those lines. I hope that is not the case. But if it is, I pray that you at least have a friend that you can turn to for support. You are a gifted poet, and it would be a tremendous loss to the world if you were no longer here.
This is my second divorce, so from previous experience I know in time it does get better no matter how great and unbearable the pain may seem at times....and pain is something that I am somewhat of an expert on.
So, I hope I'm reading more into this poem than there actually is. But if you are having suicidal thoughts and/or impulses, please seek help.
Overall, I really like this poem. It accurately depicts what goes on in the mind of the poet and how, many times, we act when we find and are in pursuit of our Muse.
There are only two lines that trouble me:
"The silky web of the words
Would be at once fractured."
This seems to me like a mixed metaphor. Silky webs are something that are extremely flexible with tremendous tensile strength. Whereas something that fractures is something that is brittle.
That's the only error I see in this wonderful poem. : )
Best regards,
Eric
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