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Review of A Shaman's Faith  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hello, Dave2Write,

So, I was looking for something to read. Guess what, I found it. I really like this piece. What a great concept! Let me break it down real quick so I can praise later.

Before I start I want you to know that these are solely my opinions, and I am no professional.

-Hook: The title fits, but it was the description that one my attention. Good work there.

-Overall Impression: As I already mentioned, great concept. I hope I can see this expanded because the feel from the character is great, reminds me of some of Stephen King's earlier characters, and the scenario is simple and awesome, given time to develop a full background to mix in and expanded "shamanism" this could be great!

-My Suggestions: Ok, so I'm a description fanatic, but recently I've found that excessive description kills the illusion as quickly as a lack of description. In your particular case, I would recommend word choice. It feels like you were trying to omit detailed description in order to fit the story in. I've found that I don't have to do that, as much anyways, with the right word choice. Hopefully it will help you out as well.

-Favorite Part: I've got two actually. I like the fight scene. I wish you had more time/space to really go for it there but it was effective as is. Also, ""Oh my," Mrs Audridge said. "That's what happened to my husband before he became ill."" You've got to appreciate a clever cliffhanger. Good work.

-Final Thoughts: Highly entertaining, lots of potential, and displays a wealth of creative talent. I love it. Keep writing! I'll definitely keep an eye on your work.

-Ryan
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