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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/kijilinn
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11 Public Reviews Given
11 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I tend to be very forthright and analytical in my reviews, which sometimes comes across as harsh or unforgiving. I'm always willing to engage in discussion about what I've written in a review and may ask questions to encourage critical thinking and self-analysis. I'm willing to review multi-chapter works on a chapter-by-chapter basis.
I'm good at...
Thoughtful, in-depth constructive criticism and character development. I tend to focus on diverse viewpoints and balanced representation. I will review graphic and explicit material. Bonus points if it's LGBTQ+ positive, especially with positive representation of bisexual men and women. Polyamory is also a bonus.
Favorite Genres
Horror, science fiction, high fantasy, urban fantasy, paranormal romance
Least Favorite Genres
technical non-fiction, children's books or juvenile literature, poetry
Favorite Item Types
Short stories between 1,500 and 10,000 words.
Least Favorite Item Types
Poems and poetry. Also, multi-chapter open-ended stories without a planned ending point. If I'm going to invest in multiple chapters, I need to know approximately when the story will end.
I will not review...
Poetry in any form: I don't know anything about it and you would get nothing useful from my review. I will not review fiction which glorifies rape, pedophilia or bestiality.
Public Reviews
1
1
Review by Linn Browning Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
As someone who has named a copper dragon "Pfeffenpooper," I just couldn't resist reading this fairy tale involving Grundlebletch von Hoogenspit. Beyond the delight in the character's name, I found myself enchanted with the story itself, an origin tale for bridge trolls, the intellectuals of the troll community. I love the concept that trolls only move in straight lines and that other species use them to flush out ambushes for this reason, too. The story is charming and I think it would make a really good spoken-word piece for a storyteller.

On a technical note, the parts in parentheses threw me off occasionally but didn't distract from the story as a whole. Excellent work!

Can't wait to read more!
Linn Browning Author IconMail Icon
2
2
Review of Illustrations  Open in new Window.
Review by Linn Browning Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (2.5)
--Story--

I found it very difficult to tell who this story is actually about, the creator or the subject. I felt like there was a lot of time spent—more than half of the story, in fact—focused on the story of the graphic novel without enough ties back to the real world and Abby’s motivations for illustrating. Additionally, I think most artists are aware that their day jobs will have to sustain them and they can’t expect a sudden flush of cash from their drawings and artistic passions. But maybe that’s just me being cynical.

Also, it’s stated that Abby will be paying her bills and raising her child on her own. Where is the child’s father? Did he die? Abandon her? Were they married? Does she even know who he is? Does she have any other family who would be standing up to help her with this or is she truly on her own?

--Characters--

Abby feels very 2-dimensional to me. In the first paragraph, she has just finished making a cappuccino and additional orders are coming in hard and fast, yet she has no emotional reaction to this, no sense of being overwhelmed or exhausted. She simply thinks of her child and all the bills she has to pay. As the only manifested character in the story, I need to care more about her than this little bit of information inspires.

--Mechanics--

The only major thing I caught is that the Avengers is usually pluralized. It’s also the title of a comic, which means it should be either italicized or in quotations (I’m not sure on the styling for that).

Also, Frankenstein was the doctor, not the monster. Personal sticking point. :)

--Setting--

The setting is clearly inside a coffee shop but we have no indication at all in what part of the country (assuming it’s American) that coffee shop is. It’s particularly relevant because $15 an hour goes a lot farther in the rural Midwest than it does in a big city like New York or L.A. I live in central Virginia near a moderately-sized college city working full-time as a paraprofessional library clerk and I’m not even making $13 an hour, for perspective.

--Additional Notes--

I think this story has a lot of potential to be a heroic story about a mother determined to give her child both the best life and the best understanding of what I assume is her son’s congenital condition. You have a good grasp of description and the narrative flows quickly but I feel like the story would be better served if you spent a little more time shaping the real world, the main character and her situation. Granted, if you’re aiming to keep the story under 1500 words, that might be difficult. Good luck and good writing!
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Review of Ted's Morning  Open in new Window.
Review by Linn Browning Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
This short piece is beautiful and heartbreaking. You really do an excellent job of conveying emotion, but I have to admit that I struggle to see this as being from the perspective of a seven-year-old. While clearly, children are capable of great depths of emotion, I feel like the average seven-year-old wouldn't have this kind of clarity of introspection and self-awareness. I feel terrible for Ted and his family and this is a beautifully written, emotional short story with a lot of potential for conveying the inner life of a child. Well done.
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