I really like the idea surrounding your poem. It really touches my heart, because I consider myself one of the ones that you are trying to connect to.
The only major problem I can see within the poem, is the fact that all of your new "sentences", (when you start a new stanza) should be capitalized.
Example:
<Some day maybe you'll see,
All the terrible things you've done to me.
Sure, it hurts, because it was wrong.
You thought I was weak,
But I wasn't, I was strong.>
I played with a little bit of the wording, a lttle bit. But you get my drift.
Keep writing! You've got some good talent hidden away.. :)
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