You have a beautiful paean to your lover in this poem. I just don't know if it's perfect yet. You quote "You came into my life...my...life Becomes colourful now". It doesn't match quite yet. But altogether it's a good poem.
Very good. I like the rhyming you included in your poem. But I wonder if you could refine the rhyming in the fourth stanza from according to accordingly to match the last sentence in the stanza. Otherwise it's great!
It's a poem that many writers have had in their minds. Distracting thoughts, people thoughts, pet thoughts, and thoughts that occupy one's mind but they stand as obstacles to writing. Well done. I hope you keep on writing!
This is a very good story, filled with action and suspense, and a touch of the spiritual sense. I liked how you intensified the action with each sentence. I think you know that each of us has a guardian spirit, from before when we were just youths. It's important, you tell us, to listen to the voice from within when scaling heights of life and avoiding death. It's great that you are among the members of WDC. Keep writing!
I like your poem. It paints a pretty picture and it calms the nerves of anyone reading it. I know it calmed me some. The last sentence was reassuring. Keep writing!
You draw a close and almost accurate picture of a lonely stranger hanging about a library. Your poem evokes a sad picture. I like your poem. Your words are apt. Keep writing.
You had me there till you mentioned "noticed on Earth". I like your story. It seems a real event in the writer's life. Nowadays the idea of an alien dropping into our midst is possible. Your story has possibilities for a full blown novel or a short story. Keep writing!
You paint a graphic description of a storm's aftermath. I like how you describe the wreckage of the storm after it has passed. The rhythm fits the story of the storm and how the people gather together to mend the rift in their town. Well done!
I laughed when I read what your poem was about. My Dad is three fourth deaf. He used to ignore my late mother's comments and she blamed his deafness as "selective hearing".
Your poem is well constructed to accommodate timely words. I like the rhythm of your poem. I hope that you get hearing aids. My Dad had to screen several aids from social media and Amazon. I think he has a good pair nowadays.
I love your story about BUtch. I, too, have a cat named Paco. I like the narrative of your story. Everything hangs together. It's a good story depicting life with a pet when you're lonely. I hope everything works better for you and Butch.
My impression of your poem is that of a sad end to a life that had dreams that weren't attainable so the author of the poem wants to die and join what s/he thinks is the dream in a different world. I like the rhythm of your poem. I like how you connected each part of your life to the dream. What I wish is that you had hope in your life to keep you from suicide. If I'm mistaken, I took what I read and assumed my conclusions.
A very good description of your cat Tigger reminds me of my cat Paco who's an orange striped tabby. Your cat and you sure have gone through a good deal of adventures. Your words of love towards your cat tell me she's a lifer. I admire Tigger's ability to survive being lost and being in a fire in the house. I agree, bringing a cat to places needs a carrier and not just any thing else. Cats have a way of slinking out of your arms and outside where you can't catch her. I thoroughly enjoyed reading your story about Tigger. It reminds me so much of why I love cats.
Your poem is descriptive of what autumn is like, not from just your point of view but from the forest's point of view. Your descriptions of a changing color to the green leaves turning into different hues that bespeaks of autumn. You sense a sadness to the forest moaning that it's 'children' are ebbing away. I like your poem. I think you should publish it in the public square of a poetry contest. Likely, you'll score points and get name recognition.
Bravo! I think you did a great job writing this entry in your diary. Your description of the squirrel looking his meal is like a dancer with nimble feet. Your dancing couple come to life with your words, dancing the waltz with well-dressed elegance. I don't know much about the dancing world but your words leave me wishing for more and more over, wishing for a tall, dark and well-groomed partner to whisk me around with my flowing gown in a waltz. I like it when you combine the waltzing couple with that of the squirrel looking for his food. You remind me of milk which I gave up a long time ago but now I'm back to drinking it because of my age and because I take medicine that affects bone integrity.
I like your poem - an innocent pet feeling the need for reassurance. You cover all his fears and ask the reader or the owner to answer those fears. Your language is like that of a young cat speaking. The cat is speaking its fears and contentment whichever comes to his consciousness. I would ask the same questions again of my human, were I to be his pet. Perhaps this poem should be given to all and anyone who adopts a cat from a shelter or adopts a cat from a breeder. Then the owner of the car signs on the dotted line. Keep writing!
I am of the same opinion as you. I love Fall weather. The colors of nature are inviting for a walk in the woods and a light picnic al fresco. I think your poem is good and it's not that long. Keep writing.
I can relate. Each person has a routine that works to organize themselves. Your content describes an every day routine. The loneliness of a single man, who seems to be missing out on the everydayness of a life with friends and family. He seems to be stuck in a rut, of having the same food to eat every day. He doesn't realize that his life is a movie that an audience appreciates. Will he notice? Will a lover come out of the woodwork and woo him? What will happen if his routine is broken by merely adding a new menu to his day?
Your prose is good and it's a description of what people these days experience when they leave home and then graduate from school, then find a decent job. You can sense that his focus is in proving himself in his job and nothing else. What about the kitchen discussions in the office for those on a break?
Your poetry reminds me of a ghostly sightings that I and my Dad have had. My ghost wants to possess me. She's obsessed with me. It's fortunate that in your poem the ghost merely shows up and performs a disappearing act.
You should compile a book of poetry and focus on ghostly experiences. I think poets have what they call a "third eye" that can see what the common human can't. They have a touch of heaven and then a touch of hell in their experiences.
I like your work. I like the words you use to describe this apparition. Keep writing.
I see you don't cook it, it 'cooks' itself with the vinegar. I'm familiar with kinilaw but in our town in the Philippines, they call a dish kilawen. I don't know what the recipe is, as the people who fix it occasionally have passed on.
I see your poem or maybe your recipe is best suited for a recipe book. You can write an international flavored cookbook.
I like your recipe. I don't have all the ingredients with me. Keep writing.
Your work is a marathon poem. It runs and grabs stuff on the way that you add to your poem. I can appreciate your frustration at your poem, but isn't that your frustration with you Muse. You shouldn't equate your pen with your Muse. However, if you insist on discussing your work with your pen, go at it and what you get is what you put into it. There's a need for inspiration and that comes from your Muse.
I don't understand the inserted LinkedIn words and people's names.
But I do understand your feelings about how your pen handles and if it doesn't handle well, your penmanship is shot. That's what I've learned from writing in a blank book and now I write using my fingers tap tap tapping on keyboard.
I like your style of writing, however. I won't be able to give you a perfect score. But I'll advise you to talk to your Muse. The Muse answers back.
This is the argument for writing poems inspired by the Spirit. Don't feel shy about Who inspires you. Your poem is a good example of writing without arguing with anyone but to make clear that you write in good spirits. I like your poem. Keep writing.
I wish I had a Grandma who would write me her advice about growing up and having a sister to hug and love. This poem is not your usual format but I'll ignore it. The content of this poem is priceless. Keep writing.
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