by Murc
For the premise of this group's activity, please see:
"Invalid Item"
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
NOTE: Please remember that the following comments and observations are only one person's opinion. Take what you can use but never be shy about discarding what you cannot. Most important of all, keep writing, improving, and contributing to our wonderful community!
WHY I CHOSE TO REVIEW THIS ITEM:
I found this item using random read, but specifically chose to review it because of the picture, a new style that I was not aware of, and the fact that you left notes for the ignorant reader.
OVERALL SENSE:
I really enjoyed this poem. You use several words that pertain to the fantasy genre, but even more specific, the fairy subject... Words like: Darkling, Fairy, Realm. It seems like the adventurer would have initially come across the nice looking path, shown in the picture. But, as I read the poem, I could clearly see myself wandering through a decaying forest.
SPELLING/GRAMMAR:
I have no complaints.
FAVOURITE LINES:
If I HAD to choose one line that I liked the most, I would have to choose,
"As I began, to my dismay,
I saw the signs of its decay:"
This seems to be the turning point of the poem. The adventurer first enters the forest, expecting some spectacular, beautiful sight. But then, he/she makes it in, and finds that it is actually falling apart due to neglect. I really like the "D" alliteration in these lines, as well as the "ay" assonance.
SUGGESTIONS FOR IMPROVEMENT:
Once again, no complaints.
CONCLUSION:
I am glad that this is the first poem that I chose to review today. The flow works well. You have a good choice of words including, in the first stanza, multiple words that can cause one to wonder, and after that, negative words that better describe the forest. I like the rhyme scheme, and I am happy that you decided to tell us what form the poem is, as well as the rest of the notes section. Great job!
Regards,
Murc
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