Hi PureSciPlus, after reading your story, I found your plot to be somewhat weak. In that, had you kept the identity of your killer unknown until the end, you would have created a story that would have had your readers hanging on to your every word. Part of the thrill of a mystery, is trying to solve an issue or find a solution to a problem. But you nuked it by revealing too early who the killer was and there was no real suspense in finding the victims either. Virginia always gave the cops accurate clues. It wasn't difficult finding the bodies because she supplied them with photos. It's all too easy.
So Virginia was raped in College by Walter and decided to exact revenge on the women who either slept with him or his buddies. But why not just kill Walter and his buddies instead of killing these innocent women? Anyway, it's your story.
Also, it would help your story if you were to incorporate evidence of the women struggling to defend themselves. Not all but just a couple. Your story would be more interesting but presently it too simple; too cut and dried. Haven't you ever watched crime movies or other mysteries and thrillers. You should take your cue from them.
As a suggestion, I would consider rewriting the story-line. Perhaps, she sends one photo to the police with abundant clues like a puzzle before she murders her victims. Then types a messages and delivers it to the cops or hacks into their phone or computer and sends them messages there. Maybe a clue is left on the last victim's body before killing again. Focus on patterns, preferred weapon(s) for murder, positions of victims, killer's fetishes. Does the killer wear a particular perfume/cologne before a killing or sprays it into the atmosphere after a killing? Does the killer have a particular signature? Such as a feather, pen, lighter, etc. These are subtle nuances that would enhance your story further.
Don't get me wrong. The effort you put into this piece is commendable. But the mystery/thriller genres of writing can be quite challenging. Your title was very appropriate. Overall, it was a good effort.
Hey, I didn't find this ranty at all. It's humorous and had me smiling throughout. I enjoyed this short story. You managed to capture the 'life' of the average person on social media. This should serve as a lesson to those who always try to 'fit in' and end up losing themselves or identity in the process. This was excellently written.
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.05 seconds at 3:05am on Nov 05, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
