I really like this piece, love the anger in it with just enough plosives for you to really spit it out as you read. Very emotive, and thanks to the rhyme scheme and repetition of the indignant 'is this your faith in me?' it really builds to a crescendo as it goes.
I actually think the end works very well, although if I was to say anything about it I would perhaps suggest a more solid conclusion, such as a sarcastic response to your rhetorical question.
Good luck in the contest
Edyn
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