At the beginning, I thought you were presenting to a class though once I got to the end I thought the reader was actually just reading your presentation.
This idea is truly one of a kind! I love how you added the "***** Teacher approval quest detected. Would you like to begin this quest? *****" at the end.
That small addition truly made the thing feel like you were handing the paper to the professor and waiting for him to read it. Then the app activates and shows up in your reality
I love how you use words that so rarely get to be. I can visualize a cook tasting his own creation and realizing just how extraordinary it is. At parts where you trail of (Joy for this cavity -) it makes me think that maybe this is what the chief or professional food taster is thinking. Overall great poem!
I love how you wrote this poem it is truly relatable to the relationship I'm currently in. I can tell you and this other person are truly in love with one another and I wish you both the best. I also enjoyed how light-hearted it is. Keep writing!
I too feel like I'm trapped inside my mind with little hope of escape. I enjoyed how you described the walls to be 'simple blackness'. No one can really fight darkness it's an abstract sort of thing that only light can fight. Though what's worse is seeing a light but being too far to reach it as you'd written.
I found this poem on read & review. I'm really glad you posted it! I can really imagine the way the boy feels.
I only have a few recommendations. You don't have to capitalize the first word of each line if it's a continuation of a thought. Though if that's your personal preference keep on! My other recommendation is to put a line in between stanzas instead of having it all clustered together.
Other than that though, I love it! Keep writing! I look forward to the future stuff you might post.
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.07 seconds at 9:00am on Nov 05, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
My review has been submitted for consideration in "