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Review by Firyx Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
That's really good! Your detail was pretty good, but I might describe the surroundings and the men a little more. Also, when you're describing him approaching the mountains, you said 'farther nearer' or something like that. It would only be 'nearer' or closer,' depending on your preference. Other than that, great job!
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