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Review by SonicV4 Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Very nice story-telling. The dialogue was well-written, not drab and uninteresting.

I do not enjoy being a stickler for grammar, but there is one sentence that stuck out to me.

"A small group of soldiers walked across the lowered bridge, followed by one in much larger and more grand armor."

Instead of 'more grand', it really should be 'grander'.

Overall, though, excellent job. I will be reading the second chapter soon.
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