Its long since iI have read such a sweet story! your story is a living example of how simple is sweet. However I think the beginning was a little abrupt. You could include one or two lines of backdrop or introduction. A lovely STORY!!
Regards,
ROSEBUD
A perfect short story u have got there!! I really enjoyed the way you explored the mind of an apparently succesful but exhausted man. With increasing materialism we really need more than sucess to be sucessful. Thanks for a wonderful reading experience!!
Helloo!
Your story is based on some very interesting themes _ love, guilt, sacrifice, passion and compromise. The story also has a concious attempt to create mystery and sensation and has an earnest desire to thrill and teach the society at the same time. However i found the story to be self revealing in some ways. Infact i had very accurately guessed the ending!
Pardon me, but i also think that the story has been thrown off balance somehow i.e. the pace of the story has not been handled properly.
I conclude by saying that i see a promising future ahead of you. Keep writing!
Yours affectionately,
ROSEBUD
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