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283 Public Reviews Given
283 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Every word we put to paper comes from someone else. We learn from parents, teachers, books, movies, idle conversations - our entire life becomes our source material. The only thing that's original and unique is our choice of how we put the words together. To be 100% honest, we'd have to credit the Dictionary, Thesaurus, and Google for every poem and story. I may suggest changes in my review. This is not meant as 'serious' literary criticism (I’m no expert). It's merely my record of the ‘bumps’ I encounter as I travel through your words. If I'm thrown by a typo, an awkward word, or a line that doesn't scan, then it's likely that others will be as well. My intent in giving a review is to applaud your work and maybe help you to improve it. A review is merely another reference to consider. If the suggestions prove useful, then use them. If I ‘just don’t get it’, then by all means ignore me! Only the author can take credit for the final words, no matter what the source.
I'm good at...
My co-workers used to call me a 'typo savant'. Apparently, I read letter by letter instead of word by word. This is both a gift and a curse. I am often distracted by a typo when I should just move on in the story.
Favorite Genres
Science Fiction, Horror, Fantasy, Mystery
Least Favorite Genres
I'm not a big fan of romance writing.
Favorite Item Types
Poetry, Short Stories
Public Reviews
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101
101
Rated: E | (5.0)
Carly,

I came across your poem at Read & Review and really enjoyed reading it.

There are many evocative images here. I especially like "Where fog hangs
Like a depressed dog".

I think you fulfilled the prompt very well with this lovely poem. The lines flow well and the structure suits the subject.

I don't find anything to critique.

Thanks for sharing and keep writing!


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102
102
Review of A remote  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Bluebird,

Welcome to WDC!

I came across your poem at Read & Review and enjoyed reading it. We would all like to have such a remote!

This is a good poem with a strong theme of regret. It flows well and the structure works well for the subject.

I do find some nits to pick (because that's what I do best *Smile*).

In the line:

         If I have that power

the word 'had' might be better than 'have'.

In the line:

         My life will be ruled by me without antsy

I don't understand the word 'antsy' did you mean to say 'anxiety'?

Of course, it's a poem so your choices are ultimately correct.



Thanks for sharing and keep writing!


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103
103
Review of My old friend  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Doxx,

I came across your poem at Read & Review and enjoyed reading it.

There are some strong images here that illustrate the struggle between what is wanted and what we wish was wanted. I liked the line about an inner vice screaming.

I do find some nits to pick (because that's what I do best *Smile*).

In the line:

         Is there something special key that I hold?

the word 'something' doesn't sound quite right to my ear?

In the line:

         and some into inner vice keeps screaming

the word 'into' seems out of place to me?

In the line:

         Tonight will it be bottle one or bottle 2..

Did you mean to use a double period?

Of course, this is a poem so your choice is ultimately correct.


Thanks for sharing and keep writing!


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104
104
Review of Hiss Of The Snake  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
MojaveMajik

I came across your poem at Read & Review and enjoyed reading it.

There are many evocative images here that illustrate the tension between what we want, what we need and which is the best choice.

I do find some nits to pick (because that's what I do best *Smile*).

In these lines:

         Look with your souls eyes
         See past the angels glow

you may have confused plural and possessive, but it's a poem so your choice is ultimately correct.

In this line:

         I will know not to look a the pretty face.

you may have meant 'at' instead of 'a'.


Thanks for sharing and keep writing!


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105
105
Review of His Chair  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Travellinda,

I found your poem on Read & Review and enjoyed it very much.

This is a touching tribute to someone whom you obviously loved very much. The poem is well written with a spare structure that is well-suited to the subject.

I don't really find anything to critique.


Thanks for sharing and keep writing!


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106
106
Review of My Friend  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Dave,

I came across your poem on Read & Review and really enjoyed it. I hadn't heard of the Eintou form, so I learned something new as well. It seems to my untrained eye that you've successfully captured the form while my ear hears you saying something worthwhile.

Thanks for sharing and keep writing!


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107
107
Review of Radiating Romance  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Lou,

I came across this poem on Read & Review and really liked it. It's short but says everything that's needed to capture a special feeling. I like the line "Even the mud and puddles / somehow feel right."

Thanks for sharing and keep writing!


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108
108
Review of The Stars  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
minhhquannn,

This is a good piece of reflective writing. I think you could easily expand on this theme.

Yes, I've wondered whether all the stars that we see here and now are still burning bright. Some of them may have already gone dark but we won't know that for another billion years.

My nits to pick:

maybe 'poses no difference to void' should be 'poses no difference from void'?

maybe 'forgotten to fill it is' should be 'forgotten to fill it in'?

Of course, this is your work so your choice is always correct. *Smile*

Keep writing!


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109
109
Rated: E | (4.5)
Prosperous Snow,

I found this in Read & Review and enjoyed it very much. I hadn't heard this form before, so I also learned something new. I like your images and the phrase 'echoes of Eden' pairs well with 'sinfully rich'.

My only nit is the 's' on 'Beckons'. 'Beckon' sounds better to my ear. Of course, it's your poem so your choice is always correct. *Smile*

Thanks for sharing!


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110
110
Review of Circles of light  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
WordAddict,

This is a nice ode to a day in the woods. I could see the dappled tree trunks and the lush undergrowth illuminated by a distant sun. I like the comparison of bioluminescence in darkness with flashes of sun in dimness.

There is one line that doesn't sound quite right to me:

         each tree, bark, leaf, gravel sparkles in shimmer

Each is singular and gravel is plural, so 'each . . . gravel' doesn't sound right to my ear. Of course, it's your poem, so your choice is ultimately correct. *Smile*

Thanks for sharing and keep writing!


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111
111
Review of Felini's Beanie  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Sharkdaddy,

Groan! *Laugh*

Well done, sir! The groan is my salute to your excellent limerick. The meter is good, the rhymes work well, and I'm impressed by the cover image. Your alliterative usage of 'la' provides a fun flow in the final line and ties in the image perfectly.

I don't find anything to critique.

Keep 'em coming!



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112
112
Rated: E | (5.0)
Miranda,

I've seen you popping up on the site a lot recently, so I thought I'd take a look. BTW, thanks for showing an interest my posts! *Smile*

I like this poem a lot. There are some strong images here, I especially like 'Our words are thinly veiled knives'. I agree that you are the dreamers, but you are also the dreams of those who came before and came up short.

Your hopeful tone is balanced nicely with the recognition of difficulties ahead. Keep in mind that history is cyclical, not linear. We progress by two steps forward and one step back (although it seems like three steps back right now). Evil exists to be overcome and there's always another evil waiting in the wings. Take satisfaction in the struggle more than in the victory.

Oh well, please forgive the pontificating . . .

Keep writing and stay positive,


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113
113
Review of Resignation  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Diane,

Good job on torching a not so good job. Talk about burning your bridges! I got several good laughs out of this piece.

Seriously, this is well written and a lot of it rings true for those who have experienced the corporate cubicle nightmare.

I once spent a couple of hours distributing my obsolete business cards among dozens of file folders in multiple filing cabinets. I'm sure they remembered me for years afterward!

I don't really find anything here to critique, so again, well done!

Keep writing,


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114
114
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Kåre,

Well done!

I enjoyed reading this one. It gave me a smile, especially the first verse. I especially like: 'bought tickets for Hilo to hula'. That line has a great rhythm to it. Your structure and rhymes are all very good. The coffee/Kona juxtaposition is cleverly done.

The only line that tripped me up was: 'with stiletto at hand'. I don't associate stiletto with bread knife? But maybe I'm missing your point. *Smile*

Full disclosure, I had to click on anything from Missoula. I grew up near Flathead Lake and we visit our daughter in Missoula every summer. Then I saw the subject of your poem and laughed out loud. My wife just received a refund for her canceled trip to Hawaii that had been scheduled for last April.

Regards,


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115
115
Review of Masterpiece  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
JMariah,

A cute scene, perhaps it will become part of a larger story some day? I thought you did a good job of capturing the five year old 'vibe'. The imagery is clear and vivid. I think it's just right for this piece.

Your technical aspects of spelling, grammar, and punctuation are good. I did find one little nit to pick: "hair away from eyes" should probably be "hair away from her eyes".

Keep writing!


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116
116
Review of Wild Cat  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Jatog,

Nicely done. You've captured the essence of the older wooden coaster rides and the emotional swings that we felt while riding. There are some strong images here and a number of good lines. I especially liked 'till intensity’s ride was done'. The third and sixth verses don't match the structure of the other four, but that's a minor nit from someone who's slightly OCD. *Smile*

Keep writing!


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117
117
Rated: E | (4.0)
Oddman,

Welcome to WDC!

This is a nice little meditative piece. I like the idea and your images flow well. Your technical aspects of grammar, spelling, and punctuation are mostly good.

I have two suggestions:

The phrase "comes on the way" seems awkward to me as a reader. I can't say whether it's right or wrong, just that it doesn't flow as well as the rest of your piece.

The sentence "Then proceed your day to day bulls*** works." seems to be missing a word, maybe "proceed with" would be more clear?

Keep writing!


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118
118
Review of The Dance Of Dis  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Angus,

An interesting and entertaining piece that brought me a smile. I learned a little something with some rhythm and rhyme to accompany the lesson. There are a couple of rough spots, but the meter works well in most of your lines. Most of the rhymes are organic and flow with the subject matter.

Overall, a good poem.

Keep writing!


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119
119
Review of Mr. Gray  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Flip,

I like your story a lot. It's a good premise and you've handled it well. There are some great images here and the dialogue sounds natural to my ear. There are a couple of rough spots, but the grammar and punctuation are good overall.

Keep writing!


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120
120
Review of Swan Lake  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Aritsou,

I like your images and the way the words flow down the page. My poetic preferences lean towards traditional rhyme and meter, but I enjoyed reading this one.

One suggestion: If the first line "Swan Lake" is intended as the title, then it might be better to underline or put it in bold to set it off from the body of the poem? If it's intentional, then never mind this nit.

Keep writing!

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121
121
Review of Trivial Pursuits  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Sophy,

Nicely done! I like the way you've used the physical layout on the page to show the interplay between your characters. This is a scene that is all too familiar, yet also timeless. You've done a good job of capturing both points of view and you've provided a hint that 'green' applies to more than just a finger.

Regards,

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122
122
Review of A WINDING ROAD.  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Monty,

Nicely done, as usual. Well deserving of the Poetic Traditions contest award. You've included some good images here and captured a bit of that wistful regret for the roads not taken that most of us feel from time to time.

Keep writing my friend!


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123
123
Review of A MANLY THING?  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Nicely done! I very much enjoy this sort of thing, putting an old joke into a fresh form. Your rhymes and meter work well for me. The images are great and the story flows well.

I have only two tiny nits to pick. A colon might work better after 'boasted drunken dude'. Also, I wonder if 'was . . piqued' sounds better than 'has . . piqued'.

Overall, it's very good and I applaud your wit.


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124
124
Rated: E | (5.0)
Nice piece with a lot of interesting facts about our favorite author! I enjoyed learning more about his background, and the questions from and about the various books are a nice touch. I taught my preschool age kids how to read with the help of the good doctor and they surprised their teachers when they went off to kindergarten. You could add something about his political cartoons, but they are definitely not intended for children!

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125
125
Review of The Struggle  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Congratulations! This is very well written.

I don't always agree with the judging in the poetry contests, but I have to agree that this one deserves the prize. I don't see anything that I would change.

I know depression is difficult to deal with and even more difficult to admit. I had a bout with depression some years ago. Medication made me functional and counseling helped, but it wasn't until I took 'control of my will' that I actually came out of it.

Thank you for sharing,
Terrence Fisher


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