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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/thebambam
Review Requests: OFF
6 Public Reviews Given
21 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review by Brent Morris Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
hello again, im really enjoying this story so far, just a few things in this. detail was much better, a few typos in there. i think the only thing i would really change in this would be a word in the last paragraph.
"But now he had been caught by the hunterians and with no means of escape, this had to be the most terrifying (changed from scariest) time of his life"
i think it works better as terrifying.
anyways, i like it, keep me posted!
Brent
2
2
Review of Just a story  Open in new Window.
Review by Brent Morris Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
i very much enjoyed the story, but i think it could have gone, maybe jumping ahead to the reaction of amy when she got the present, or how the article came out.

other then that, i enjoyed the look into the life of a female columnist!

be well,
brent
3
3
Review of A Memory Moment  Open in new Window.
Review by Brent Morris Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
i have to say, very stimulating. reminds me of my own love. some of it i dont get though, like the '67 and daisy chains. maybe more of i dont understand it there. and the cat, maybe its really the woman thinking that of herself. if that was what it was i could understand it there. if not, id personally take out the '67 and cat paragraph. that to me would make it perfect.
i loved it though very romantic and moving.
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Review by Brent Morris Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (2.0)
hi, this is a very interesting piece. im guessing that its about the twin towers. but may i say that unless you were intentionally trying to make the names funny, that maybe you would do better to change them. i think most people would be able to get the idea of what you are writing about even if you had different names... thats my only thing with this... other than that, i loved it! though it was funny and puts a different light on the whole 9/11 thing

bambam
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