A difficult subject to cover and done in a hard hitting, almost brutal way - but this is not a negative thing with this kind of work. It NEEDS to be hard hitting if the subject matter is to be taken seriously. Nice to see poetry that isn't hearts and flowers for a change and isn't afraid to tackle such issues. Line 8 reads awkwardly as 'sneak a peek of my dreams' would work better with 'at' or 'inside'. Perhaps a slight change such as this would make it flow a little easier over that area. Also the word Wannabe doesn't require a '-' to separate the word into two halves but this may have been more for effect than accuracy. Without knowing the author previously it is hard to tell. Other than that I like this piece and I feel the author has great potential.
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