I enjoyed reading your poem and found more than one meaning in it. I found it to be one of courage and strength but yet never forgetting the fears that must be faced to accomplish one's goals. In the end, I read even when you do conquer your fears, you must remember them or they may still be your down fall.
I enjoyed reading your poem and found it to be very intriguing. I'm not sure if this is what you had in mind but to me I see a bad relationship. Maybe the female, a young woman or maybe even middle aged, has just realized it. I'm not sure if the relationship has always been bad or if things have just changed. The relationship is bad because the male is an abuser, mentally but maybe not physically. For some reason I'm thinking maybe it is something that has just happened and he has changed. I can see something tragic in his life, maybe their life like the loss of a child and that is what has changed him.
This is pretty good but it would read a lot better if you broke it down into a few more paragraphs. I saw a few places that could be done as a quote to give it some dialogue too and I think you should expand it some. Give some more background and some more future and you will have a great short story or book, depending on how long you expand it.
You are a very talented writer and from your poems, I know you are a very compassionate and uplifting person. I don't know what you do during your "day job" but if you are not writing, you should be in some sort of a care giving industry as this seems to be your passion.
This is a decent start but it needs more. It doesn't really tell anything although it seems like part of a story. It needs something behind it ... background and it needs a future. Let me know when you have more. This shows great potential you just need to give more.
You have a nice start here but I feel as though there is more to be said. Like why is she crying? What happened? This seems like a picture, which while pretty leaves many questions and doesn't answer many. I would like to know what has happened to cause her to be so sad.
You have written a nice little song. It would be interesting in hearing it put to music. I have written two poems (the first two in my better poems, if you're interested), which many people have told me sound like songs but I don't write music so who knows if they will ever be or not. I suppose, it is meant to be, they will and if not, they won't.
Very good beginning and welcome to the site. Now you can post your writings and read some writings and rate and review. This is a great site for writers as it is full of writers who love to write and most people are very supportive. Since this place is ran by writers, for writers you can learn a lot here. You just need to post and be willing to accept some constructive criticism.
I wish you the best of luck and again, welcome to the site,
Your poem is very well written with great flow and style. It speaks of power and strength every woman has within her. It doesn't speak of domination over men but it does imply of the secret hold women posses over men.
Your poem is very nice and I see it as one that should be read by everybody every now and then. There are times when you're feeling very down and your poem could help lift someone up and for someone who is at the top, it could help remind them of how grateful they should be.
Very realistic, just watch out, there may be a price put on your head now. I can't for the life of me figure out how these beasts think. There is no realm or reason to them. They are of hate and stupidity.
I love it!!! I heard one that's close, "Please forgive me my breasts seem to be staring at your eyes." But I like yours better. How did you come up with it? Is it a response you gave or received?
My talents do not include humor although I can come up with a few good come backs sometimes.
You have a good poem with nice style and flow. To me, I see a person who is very shy and because of that is the target of others. The treatment they receive instead of acceptance turns their hearts to hate and can lead to other things. Not sure if that's what you meant, but that's what I got.
To me this is a perfect poem. It paints a picture that everyone can relate to and will invoke their own memories making this a personalized poem for all.
You have great style, your poem flows nicely and your rhyme is good.
What a beautiful tribute to spring! I can see the towering mountain face fresh with the green, pinks, purples and yellows of the grass and flowers awakened from their icy slumber.
I have been having spring fever weekend it is nice, costing me a lot of money in gas.
You have written a very nice poem invoking true friendship. To me, it is about a friendship that started when the children were very young and grew stronger into adulthood. The "friends" could be a boy and girl whose friendship has not only grown stronger over the years but could have possibly grown into a love as well.
Your poem is something everyone can relate to. I have written similar ones and have done what you have written about.
My favorite part is:
"The bedsheet tangled 'round my waist
Is your arms wrapped from behind.
The crickets near my window
Whisper what is on your mind."
You have written a great poem. I have written some of my best stuff when I have been depressed. In fact, when life is pretty good, my writing isn't near as good and sometimes stinks.
I truly enjoyed reading your poem. You have great flow and I liked your rhyme. I didn't spot anything that needed to be corrected but then editing is not my strong point and I am tired so I could have missed a lot. But I did like your poem.
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