I loved the writing here, and the story was great as well, but I was a little underwhelmed by the ending. I think there could probably be a little more clever ending instead of a fairly standard horror one. That aside, I enjoyed the read. :)
Hello. I'm new here, so take my words with some salt.
I liked it. Quite a bit even. However, IMHO, I think it would be more impactful if we realize he did it at the very end of the story instead of 3/4 in. A twist always works best the later it's delivered. Just like a punchline in a joke must be.
Great job! :)
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/zadora
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.08 seconds at 10:04am on Dec 22, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
