The Industrial Revolution

The Industrial Revolution (1793 – 1885)

Once upon a time in a jam mine just near Wapping , there lived a penguin waxer named Meredith Zanzibar Honky Tonk Smith-Klein-Calvin. She slaved all day waxing penguins, so that these brave little miners could shoot down the water slide into the mine where they would labour all day at the jam seam.

Meredith struggled to make a living in these hard times, times which saw jam production fall behind cheaper Eastern European competitors which had recently flooded the British market due to the amalgamation of twelve former Soviet Union Bloc countries.

‘Now then Tabatha’, said a man who said ‘Now then Tabatha’ . Later on in his life he went on to say other things such as, ‘Wapping station at two forty five’, ‘I’ll have one of them’, and ‘bottom’.

Tabatha looked at him languorously. Quickly the story changed scene because neither Tabatha nor the man who said ‘Now then Tabitha’ appear in any of the important bits of this story.

Meredith put down the final penguin, freshly waxed and eager to work. She longed for the day when she could escape the turgid monotony of her oppressed life; a day when she could skip over Alpine mountains, her skirt flowing in the wind stroking the heads of buttercups and other assorted flora and fauna; a day when she could stumble across a well built Alpine lad and together they would find a quiet haystack where she could talk about world politics and the effects of Italian abstractionism on the latter twentieth century. Yes, these were her dreams and god awful they were to.

With a tired inevitability the story unfolded.

THE END.