Plugging my Ears...

When the ear hears, observe the mind. Does it get caught up and make a story out of the sound? Is it disturbed? You can know this, stay with it, be aware. At times you may want to escape from the sounds, but that is not the way out. You must escape through awareness.


-Ajahn Chah, "Still Forest Pool"

PLUGGING MY EARS….

allows me to discover the possible origin of the voice. Not just to hear it leave the body, but to realize that it comes from somewhere in the mind, bouncing in the vacuum before finding the oral cavity for its departure.

A feeling of insanity exists to think that while I am suppose to be sleeping, I am instead watching each thought arrive from some unknown place, hit the inside of my head, gain momentum, and finally get so mixed up with other thoughts that it vanishes in the confusion.

Since it is dark and no audible speaking is being done, the unspoken thought continues to bounce around, getting mixed up with all the thoughts that continue to be originating, bouncing and colliding, while the spirit who owns this body and, who is observing these almost visible thoughts, is actually kept awake by the constant barrage of ideas.

I know this has happened to me many times before, but I’ve ignored it. I’ve told myself that I would write down in the morning the creative ideas I had during the night, only to find that the thoughts somehow got lost. Since I didn’t speak them, where did those thoughts go? Why weren’t they there in the morning to be remembered and written down? Did they somehow escape and are now going to be thought of by someone else? Is this the true meaning of “beating someone else to the punch”?

I also find that plugging my ears to prevent me from hearing a particularly unpleasant sound from the outside merely traps a trace of the sound inside my head. Yet, is it a trace of the sound or a memory of the sound that gets trapped? Whether it is a trace or a memory, the effect is the same…sleep remains unreachable.

If the mouth (being the door) were open, producing sounds, then thoughts would be escaping, thus allowing the mind to empty itself. And after this occurs, then sleep could come; though I doubt it will come through the mouth.

Interestingly enough, sounds and thoughts that I (or someone else) produce may put someone else to sleep, so maybe sleep enters through the ears. As the ears don’t make sounds, perhaps they are entry points for the slumber that I often seek in vain. But how could that be when plugging my hears seems to detach me from the world of unwanted sounds and allows me to attain the appearance of sleep, even while my mind may be churning and reverberating thoughts.

© ’82, 2006 Karl Arthur King