I Want To Forget

.................

i want to just forget
everything that i regret
all of my pain
the millions of tears pouring like rain
all of the hurt and frustration
i want to forget and go on a vacation
a vacation from my life
a vacation from this knife
a vacation from this sorrow
a vacation from another tomorow
sometimes i forget to forget
and i suddenly remember those regrets
sometimes you want to help me
but it ends up destroying me
i want it all to end
an impossibility that can't mend
i want to stop thinking
about all that bad timing
i want to be careless
and stop being hopeless
i want to move on
but still stay strong
i can do no such thing
having people remind me of everything
they never used to care
about me or my nightmare
so why now?
when i was starting to forget anyhow?
i don't want to be helped anymore
so why do they try to break through that door?
the door keeping them out
and all of my self doubt
why don't they let me forget?
those memories soaring through my mind like a jet
you thinking talking about it will only make me cry
but you're wrong, when we talk i want to die.