Bertie's Bath Time Mayhem

                              BERTIE’S BATH TIME MAYHEM


“Yippee. Yippee, it’s “Elmer’s Bath Day”. I love this episode. I have seen it so many times,” giggled Bertie Bear as he jumped up and down on the couch, pounding his fists into the cushions with enthusiasm.

“B”- Bear, as he was affectionately called by his mother, loved water; lots and lots of water. He could play for hours. His favorite TV show was “Splash” and this was the best episode. Bertie couldn’t get enough of it. In this episode Elmer, the elephant was making a mud bath. Bertie was captivated, and this gave him an idea.

Bertie looked for Mamma. He could see her through the kitchen window talking to the old raccoon from next door, Rocky. Whenever Mamma was tending to the berry patch, Rocky would talk her ear off about the forest gossip. Bertie decided not to interrupt; it would be rude. 
   
  “Knock, Knock, Hey Bertie are you home?” Bennie, his best bear friend, inquired.

“You are just in time, Bennie; I’m going to make a “mud” bath.  Come and help.”

“Sure!!!!!!!!!!!!!!................... Um, but are we allowed?” whispered Bennie; giving his enthusiasm a second thought.

“Of course we are. Mamma would be happy that I took my bath by myself,” Bennie announced proudly (hoping this wasn’t a lie.)

“Let’s go it sounds like fun.”

The bathroom was a treasure chest of ingredients. Into the tub, Bertie poured a little shampoo, a couple of pumps of hand soap, and huge squirt of toothpaste. Papa’s shaving cream was a nice touch. It looked like a tall cone of blue whipping cream on a birthday cake – “yum, yum,” thought Bertie.  Bennie helped, too. He added dish soap from the kitchen; a little at first but then decided the whole bottle needed to go in along with some of Mrs. Mamma Bear’s hair conditioner – of course.
The most important ingredient was next: water. Bernie reached over to turn it on. A little voice reminded him of mamma’s rule: never to touch the hot water tap without the help of a big bear, so he turned on the cold water tap. Mounds of bubbles formed and rose with the water level. Now this was Bertie’s kind of mud bath.

“This is so much fun, Bennie,” Bertie was jumping up and down, clapping his hands.

“Bertie, look at the floor. We have made a big, slippery mess. Your mamma is going to kill us.”

After observing the whole picture from the bath toy chest, Tub-Tub, the rubber ducky, chimed in,

“Bertie, you know you’re not allowed to use your mamma’s favorite bath bubbles and shampoo.”
“Tub-Tub, they are ALL important things to make my mud bath,” Bertie replied assuredly.

Bertie missed the look of disagreement on Tub-Tub’s face because he was so busy creating his masterpiece.

“Look Bertie, the tub is running over,” interrupted Bennie excitedly, hopping from one foot to the other.

“Shhh! be quiet both of you! I don’t want mamma to hear us. She’ll come in before my bath is finished.”

Bertie shut off the water and climbed in.

“Brrrrrrrrh is it ever cold. It reminds me of playing in the river in the summertime,” chattered Bertie, “Come in, Bennie.”

Bennie just stared at Bertie’s teeth chattering. Then he looked to Tub-Tub, who ignored Bennie’s inquisitive eyes and said,

“It’s too cold for my rubber.”

Bennie was still unsure about this situation. He timidly got into the tub.  Suddenly, the kitchen screen door crashed open.

“OH NO! Mamma Bear” squawked Tub-Tub. Trouble is finally here.

With that Bennie hopped out, nearly slipping on the gooey mess that didn’t make it into the tub, and rushed to the chair next to the bathroom window and climbed up to exit.

“I’m out of here too,” squeaked Little Peabody, the bath-toy fish, and he flopped out of the tub and onto the bathroom floor, squiggling under it for safety.

The bathroom door slammed open, and Mamma Bear stood there in the door frame, larger than life, with her hands on her hips.  Bertie stopped all playfulness, and he stared at his mamma.  Mamma Bear looked around the bathroom, rolling her eyes and shaking her head. What a disaster scene.

“What have you done Bertie?” boomed Mamma Bear.

Uh oh, no “B”-Bear, his momma used his full name.


“I wanted to have a bath like Elmer Elephant has, Mamma.”

“And you, Bennie?” catching his escape from the corner of her eye.

“Uh, I was just helping Bertie make his bath, and uh, then I was going home for supper.”

“Through the window, Bennie? I think the door would be safer, don’t you?”
Bennie nodded uncomfortably and climbed down. .

“Bertie, get out of the tub and clean up all this mess. You too, Bennie”

“I’m sorry Mamma.” Bertie sniffled.

“No tears, Bertie. Just get out of the tub and help Bennie.”

Half an hour later the mess was cleaned up. Both were really sorry for making Bertie’s mamma upset.

“That was a fun bath time don’t you think, Bennie?” whispered Bertie, wondering when he could do that again.

“Yah, I guess so. I bet it will be a while before we can do that again.”

At the same time Bertie looked at Bennie, and realizing they were thinking the same thing, he rolled on the floor and laughter could be heard all the way out to the berry patch.